Just saw my dear...
hoping to talk things out...
sigh...right after a whole day of stuff...
God it's really taxing...!!
I just want her to be happy...
Why can't I do that now?... Kenneth...out of the box thinking you must...
my mind is so cropped up! I can't stand it...how am I going to take this? I really don't know...
Somebody...help me!
SAve me! someone!
give me some leads!!!....
I've been cracking my dumb head all day...yet I can't think of anything...
sigh...
I've to do something and I want to do something....
=/
help me! someone!!
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A Dash of life and a shot of me... a cocktail you"ll see
- Kenneth
- Life is all about taking Risks... ponder too much and you end up doing nothing. All you need is to smile at fear and at any stumble...tell me you "Just did it"... that's all that matters. More about me...well once a windsurf racer, once a kayak racer, once a sailor, basically once a madness water sportsman damn it... then once a DJ and once a bartender... other than these...were just short term hopping of jobs as waiter, accounts asst and many other free lance crap. The Underdog!
Blog Archive
- ► 2007 (302)
2 comments:
u need to let the matter rest for now before u crack. Somethings are beyond control and u need to learn that...You want help..its a choice you make as to whether u wana allow yaself to be treated this way and made to go thru this torture..u dont deserve it..and bias i may be but she doesn't deserve all the effort and thgt ure putting into this...
I MEAN IT! Let it go..
mei
well I've given somethings some thought...
I for one, found that there hasn't been a girl I'd put down so much for.
And moreover, I find that it's always to give things one more shot. If it's meant to fail big time... then somehow, by then God might be just telling me something...
The most important thing to me, would be to find that she is happy. probably at the end of the day, it doesn't matter if I am with her or not... Love ain't possession. If I'm able to give it to her, it will be great, otherwise... if time tells that I'm no matter what unable to give her the kind of things she wants to see...then though it's going to very painful...by then I'll hide the pain inside and just let her go.
The reasons by then would be clear.
As friends, we try not to be bias in looking at the situation, mei. If not we will fall into the place of the people like her friends... who took on sides...bias towards her... and I didn't like that. Thus I really don't want any of my friends to fall into that region.
My life has been shit... Sharon caused me pain too...Ina did too....but yet, none of them made me want to go back to them at the end of the day. Do you remember?
So the reason is....why?
First of all...Sharon totally smashed me... she didn't have a gd reason at all...moreover... she went on to my 'gd friend' then. And next... she didn't really love me in the first place.
Ina, she loved me....well and long...but she was sticking on to me so much....and always get her friends and family involved in our matters....
when her tantrums hit.... she can be physically abusive... emotionally and stuff like that...
above all....all those that I've mentioned so far...are just as demanding.
Now back to this case...the only thing that I've to keep constant would be demands... the rest of it... it all didn't hit the extence and outer limits of the other 2.
After meeting sharon during the holidays...just for a catch up...yes she has changed alot...seen things on a bigger picture...
but there is no way, I can bring myself to love her again... no way...
Well... I guess at the moment...I won't die from all these... I did mention, I can live without her...but I chose not to, coz there is yet something different about her. that the others I've been with doesn't.
And ultimately, If it's to fail on hard times... I know i can handle it. Coz' I've already handled the worst situation in my life yet. And by then the choice will be laid firm and strong.
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