This whole darn weekend was basically spent in the toilet....
No I wasn't locked in there for punishment...and neither was it that I loved the
smell of it....
Stupid tummy flu just swept me off my feet....
Seriously... it's horrible....
felt so weak...
aiyoh...
All the stuff I brought home to do...I couldn't get done.... not that I can bring it into the toilet
and do any typing while having the cramped up face right?..... lol......hahahaaa....
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Another day...
hmmm Weekends!...finally....some small break for the busy schedule
of daily unending time work...
Tiring but yes it's kinda fun....shit sounds so sadistic huh...hahaha
headed on the point of thought on what in the world am I gona do next now...
well...career starting up...so next in the line would be house car and wife...
hohoho....
house and car in time will come.....wife....erhhmmmm....now that's gona be abit of a problem...
not so much of cannot get but rather have the fear lingering somewhere....
somehow it's just subconscious... especially when my schedule is so tight right now...
but yet to me....having a she in my life would be essential... brings more meaning to the
status of being successful....
That's having someone to share it all with you... and soon then those to carry it on...the way....
the characteristic...the whole deal with improvisations...
oh well....still keeping the eyes open....
spotted a plain Jane though...sounded like a 'EEeeeeeeee' at the end of the name but really...
she looks like a nice plain Jane....
then again I'll whack on the idea of... looks can be deceiving...
lol...damn...
I'm scar tissue...
"yes indeed i'm alone again
and here comes emptiness crashing in
it's either love or hate
i can't find in between
cause i've been with witches
and i have been with a queen
it wouldn't have worked out any way
so for now it's just another lonely day ay ay
further along we just may
but for now it's just another lonely day
wish there was something
i could say or do
see cause i can resist anything
but the temptation from you
but i'd rather walk alone
than chase you around
i would rather fall myself
than let you drag me on down
it wouldn't have worked out any way
so for now it's just another lonely day ay ay
further along we just may
but for now it's just another lonely day
yesterday seems like a life ago
cause the one i love
today i hardly know
you i held so close in my heart oh dear
grow further from me
with every falling tear
it wouldn't have worked out any way
so for now it's just another lonely day,ay ay
further along we just may, ay ay
but for now it's just another lonely day "
of daily unending time work...
Tiring but yes it's kinda fun....shit sounds so sadistic huh...hahaha
headed on the point of thought on what in the world am I gona do next now...
well...career starting up...so next in the line would be house car and wife...
hohoho....
house and car in time will come.....wife....erhhmmmm....now that's gona be abit of a problem...
not so much of cannot get but rather have the fear lingering somewhere....
somehow it's just subconscious... especially when my schedule is so tight right now...
but yet to me....having a she in my life would be essential... brings more meaning to the
status of being successful....
That's having someone to share it all with you... and soon then those to carry it on...the way....
the characteristic...the whole deal with improvisations...
oh well....still keeping the eyes open....
spotted a plain Jane though...sounded like a 'EEeeeeeeee' at the end of the name but really...
she looks like a nice plain Jane....
then again I'll whack on the idea of... looks can be deceiving...
lol...damn...
I'm scar tissue...
"yes indeed i'm alone again
and here comes emptiness crashing in
it's either love or hate
i can't find in between
cause i've been with witches
and i have been with a queen
it wouldn't have worked out any way
so for now it's just another lonely day ay ay
further along we just may
but for now it's just another lonely day
wish there was something
i could say or do
see cause i can resist anything
but the temptation from you
but i'd rather walk alone
than chase you around
i would rather fall myself
than let you drag me on down
it wouldn't have worked out any way
so for now it's just another lonely day ay ay
further along we just may
but for now it's just another lonely day
yesterday seems like a life ago
cause the one i love
today i hardly know
you i held so close in my heart oh dear
grow further from me
with every falling tear
it wouldn't have worked out any way
so for now it's just another lonely day,ay ay
further along we just may, ay ay
but for now it's just another lonely day "
Phew! what a day....what a day....
A move to the new office....whilst the renovation is on going...
All of a sudden, it seems like I'm the one making decisions, making changes to the renovation plans...
having constracters and suppliers reporting to me regarding linits, constrains and what they were planning for...
And most of all...signing the hell for all the crazy expensive stuff...
Firming the phone line transfer from the old office to the new and getting the phone system fixed up together with
the new 2 madnessly powerful multi copiers that I went shopping around for the company for...
not forgetting the internet connection, setting of a server and the assembly of 7 new sets of computers....
and a referbishment of the old ones....All were no joke....
a huge responsibility placed unto me...tired... handling the core factors to the operation flow of the company
during this transition....highly crucial. A day of no communications could mean a few hundred thousand of
opportunity cost... like straight having my butt on the grill....
Well finally....all done....all done...
all done with a day having no aircon, no chair, lagging water, multi tasking like 5 load of different focal of concern
at a go...and having had only 2 hrs of sleep the night before...
wah....army wasn't so siong last time.....was it?....
or is today's operation MOVE HUGE OFFICE was meant for the SOFs?...hahahaa.....
retiring on my bed...sinking into the comfort of soft pillows....is like heaven.....
=)
A move to the new office....whilst the renovation is on going...
All of a sudden, it seems like I'm the one making decisions, making changes to the renovation plans...
having constracters and suppliers reporting to me regarding linits, constrains and what they were planning for...
And most of all...signing the hell for all the crazy expensive stuff...
Firming the phone line transfer from the old office to the new and getting the phone system fixed up together with
the new 2 madnessly powerful multi copiers that I went shopping around for the company for...
not forgetting the internet connection, setting of a server and the assembly of 7 new sets of computers....
and a referbishment of the old ones....All were no joke....
a huge responsibility placed unto me...tired... handling the core factors to the operation flow of the company
during this transition....highly crucial. A day of no communications could mean a few hundred thousand of
opportunity cost... like straight having my butt on the grill....
Well finally....all done....all done...
all done with a day having no aircon, no chair, lagging water, multi tasking like 5 load of different focal of concern
at a go...and having had only 2 hrs of sleep the night before...
wah....army wasn't so siong last time.....was it?....
or is today's operation MOVE HUGE OFFICE was meant for the SOFs?...hahahaa.....
retiring on my bed...sinking into the comfort of soft pillows....is like heaven.....
=)
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Morning breakfast at Ang Mo Kio Ave 4...
truly brings back old memories.
The very old stores selling soya bean milk...
the wan tan mee stall and the one selling the best kway chap
I ever had that got me liking it so much.
The long time hawkers were still there besides the new ones springing up
here and there...
But they are the everlasting... the survival of the fittest...they are the strong ones.
I remembered myself as a young boy at about 5...
I would be at the market with my mum and my dad...strolling to the long morning queue
at the fried carrot cake stall for some nice hot tasty starch and off to the fishy wet market
with old aunties pushing around and all I saw was their butt right in my face.
It all takes a fart and I'd be down...foaming....lol...
Felt like a little boy again...
but reality hits when leaving for work...
I'm already 26 going on 27...
before I know it I'm hitting the 30 mark very soon and I'm at a point
where I either make or break....
and I jolly well make my mark in business and hit my target annual income...
Haiz... 2nd day of official work and already almost 1/3 of the company's cases and
business handlings have already been passed on to me...
fighting fire on the spot...
All the turbo charged learning...
sweeping me off...
Hey I'm gona say that this job can be rather addictive...
You just wanna keep thinking, keep working on cases and issues...
and seeing results coming in one by one.
hohoho....GoGoGo!
truly brings back old memories.
The very old stores selling soya bean milk...
the wan tan mee stall and the one selling the best kway chap
I ever had that got me liking it so much.
The long time hawkers were still there besides the new ones springing up
here and there...
But they are the everlasting... the survival of the fittest...they are the strong ones.
I remembered myself as a young boy at about 5...
I would be at the market with my mum and my dad...strolling to the long morning queue
at the fried carrot cake stall for some nice hot tasty starch and off to the fishy wet market
with old aunties pushing around and all I saw was their butt right in my face.
It all takes a fart and I'd be down...foaming....lol...
Felt like a little boy again...
but reality hits when leaving for work...
I'm already 26 going on 27...
before I know it I'm hitting the 30 mark very soon and I'm at a point
where I either make or break....
and I jolly well make my mark in business and hit my target annual income...
Haiz... 2nd day of official work and already almost 1/3 of the company's cases and
business handlings have already been passed on to me...
fighting fire on the spot...
All the turbo charged learning...
sweeping me off...
Hey I'm gona say that this job can be rather addictive...
You just wanna keep thinking, keep working on cases and issues...
and seeing results coming in one by one.
hohoho....GoGoGo!
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
My Art of topping score...strategy set. =) On the tryout. hahaha...
My 3 steps in sales...
the good set of 'C's or the bad set of 'C's??....
hmmm....
It's either the
Convince
then
Confuse
then
Con
For a one time sweep
or
Convince
then
Condition
then
Care
For a long term consumer relationship...thus come referrals and bigger bucks...
Process may be slow, but returns has a high chance of ripping out the ceiling tiles in potentials.
=)
the good set of 'C's or the bad set of 'C's??....
hmmm....
It's either the
Convince
then
Confuse
then
Con
For a one time sweep
or
Convince
then
Condition
then
Care
For a long term consumer relationship...thus come referrals and bigger bucks...
Process may be slow, but returns has a high chance of ripping out the ceiling tiles in potentials.
=)
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Funny how some people just wanna look at things in one direction...
blindly doing things for the sake of it and not knowing if there are
any good effect in future or any possible cost savings....
All he wants was for me to just say that he made a great choice.
Maybe I'm just too frank when it comes to giving opinions of a
certain decision...
And he ain't much of a bird's eye watcher...
Well...maybe he hasn't been out long enough to know
and simply living in the idealistic dream...
Whatever really.....just whatever bradda....
blindly doing things for the sake of it and not knowing if there are
any good effect in future or any possible cost savings....
All he wants was for me to just say that he made a great choice.
Maybe I'm just too frank when it comes to giving opinions of a
certain decision...
And he ain't much of a bird's eye watcher...
Well...maybe he hasn't been out long enough to know
and simply living in the idealistic dream...
Whatever really.....just whatever bradda....
Catching a glimpse of my journey in the business circle...
I found alot of potential for me to rise...
yet a heavy responsibility imposed upon me...
to search and conquer regions for control and it has to be
fast and furious and sure...
One mistake would mean a few hundred thousand USD...
Damn I don't think I'll wanna make such a mistake....
but anyway...
I guess trying and starting off for the first step...
there is bound to be mistakes here and there....
But I won't make the biggest mistake of all....
That's to not even try....not even do anything... =)
I found alot of potential for me to rise...
yet a heavy responsibility imposed upon me...
to search and conquer regions for control and it has to be
fast and furious and sure...
One mistake would mean a few hundred thousand USD...
Damn I don't think I'll wanna make such a mistake....
but anyway...
I guess trying and starting off for the first step...
there is bound to be mistakes here and there....
But I won't make the biggest mistake of all....
That's to not even try....not even do anything... =)
Friday, June 15, 2007
It's never been easy for me
To find words to go along, with a melody
But this time there's actually something, on my mind
So please forgive these few brief awkward lines
Since I've met you, my whole heart has changed
It's not just my beats, you've rearranged
I was living in the past, but somehow you've brought me back
And I haven't felt like this since before buddy said Ken relax
And while I know, based on my track record
I might not seem like the choices best
All I'm asking you, is don't write me off, just yet
For all days I've been telling myself, the same old story
That I'm happy to live off my all time, former glories
But you've given me a reason, to take another chance
Now I need you, despite the fact, that you'd wipe up all my plans
And though I know, I've already blown more chances
Than anyone should ever get
All I'm asking you, is don't write me off, just yet
To find words to go along, with a melody
But this time there's actually something, on my mind
So please forgive these few brief awkward lines
Since I've met you, my whole heart has changed
It's not just my beats, you've rearranged
I was living in the past, but somehow you've brought me back
And I haven't felt like this since before buddy said Ken relax
And while I know, based on my track record
I might not seem like the choices best
All I'm asking you, is don't write me off, just yet
For all days I've been telling myself, the same old story
That I'm happy to live off my all time, former glories
But you've given me a reason, to take another chance
Now I need you, despite the fact, that you'd wipe up all my plans
And though I know, I've already blown more chances
Than anyone should ever get
All I'm asking you, is don't write me off, just yet
Wah the end of my ICT finally....
5 days....short but really mentally draining.
Fortunately the people I was supporting in the Armour unit
had many of my friends in there and those I've worked with before
during my tour in the Division HQ. I was able to get things done easily
and get lucky with some stuff to make my life easier.
All days were nothing much but planning and planning...
explaining to people on the bigger picture of how things would turn out,
the reasons for certain things being done and stuff...
So much strategizing so much thinking so much talking...
Alamak....so much for them taking this as a break from the daily routine
in life...
I think it's worse....
Hardly have time to sleep there...
simply late nights and super early mornings...
and all with a super long winded CO...
5 days....short but really mentally draining.
Fortunately the people I was supporting in the Armour unit
had many of my friends in there and those I've worked with before
during my tour in the Division HQ. I was able to get things done easily
and get lucky with some stuff to make my life easier.
All days were nothing much but planning and planning...
explaining to people on the bigger picture of how things would turn out,
the reasons for certain things being done and stuff...
So much strategizing so much thinking so much talking...
Alamak....so much for them taking this as a break from the daily routine
in life...
I think it's worse....
Hardly have time to sleep there...
simply late nights and super early mornings...
and all with a super long winded CO...
And so I said "Being an officer does not give me any great
benefits, niether does it give power for suppression...
it simply imposes responsibilities. We here my brothers, are going to be
the kings of the battlefield and must make our presence felt by those we
standby for support."
All of a sudden, great memories of my military life just swept by and I found
that even as new breed officers, the higher ranking ones have to lean towards us for
support and advice....
benefits, niether does it give power for suppression...
it simply imposes responsibilities. We here my brothers, are going to be
the kings of the battlefield and must make our presence felt by those we
standby for support."
All of a sudden, great memories of my military life just swept by and I found
that even as new breed officers, the higher ranking ones have to lean towards us for
support and advice....
Saturday, June 09, 2007
This easy feelin'...Hohoho...
~I like the way your sparkling earrings lay,
Against your skin, it's so brown
And i wanna sleep with you
In the desert tonight
With a billion stars all around
'cause i gotta peaceful easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the
Ground
And i found out a long time ago
What a woman can do to your soul
but she can't take you anyway
You don't already know how to go
And i gotta peaceful, easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the ground
I get this feeling i may know you
As a lover and a friend
But this voice keeps whispering
In my other ear, tells me
I may never see you again
'cause i get a peaceful, easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the ground~
Against your skin, it's so brown
And i wanna sleep with you
In the desert tonight
With a billion stars all around
'cause i gotta peaceful easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the
Ground
And i found out a long time ago
What a woman can do to your soul
but she can't take you anyway
You don't already know how to go
And i gotta peaceful, easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the ground
I get this feeling i may know you
As a lover and a friend
But this voice keeps whispering
In my other ear, tells me
I may never see you again
'cause i get a peaceful, easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the ground~
Friday, June 08, 2007
Finally!
Wow what a week!
Came back from the wonderful Bali trip...
Feeling all refreshed and good to go for a new chapter in my life!
Work!
The very thing I've been waiting for since I started studying...
couldn't stand the times that I had to do and learn things that aren't
really gonna be applied in daily life....
to memorize sickening lot of stuff that doesn't help in the survival in this
society...all the blah blahs...
Bali was great....real great... The nice beach...and snorkelling area and
feeding the fishes...
The nice surfers' wet dream come true, where the waves keep coming
and coming unending together with the cool sea breeze...nice!
The cold deep in Ayung River while the few were staying on the rafting boat...
So many things! So fun...so relaxing....not forgetting the massages and spa I had
everyday there...simply gets me all bonded with the bed well at night....hahaha....
And coming home... I get to be a big purchaser for the company...
hahaha...imagine electronic and IT manufacturing companies like Toshiba,
Canon, Commax....all treating you like some king...taking all the effort and time
to entertain you and convince you that their product is better....hohoho....sweet!
Friday....8th of June...the moment of truth...
I FREAKIN' CLEARED UNIVERSITY ALREADY!!!!!! WOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
I seriously thought I was going to fail 3 modules out of the 8 that I was dealing with...
coz I was only able to do 1 1/2 Qn to 2 Qns max...the rest of it was trying my luck and
putting down my own understanding without even solving any of the problems....
Anyway....it's prep for convocation now and into the workforce!
The target for the year would be aiming and hitting the 20mil deal and more to come!!!
GoGoGo!!!!
Gotta prove myself in 4 months...sitting in the position of Asst Manager...stress....
But hey this is good stress...
Hahahaaaa....
Monday! off to be an Army fighting machine once again!!!....for 5 days! hahaha....
Came back from the wonderful Bali trip...
Feeling all refreshed and good to go for a new chapter in my life!
Work!
The very thing I've been waiting for since I started studying...
couldn't stand the times that I had to do and learn things that aren't
really gonna be applied in daily life....
to memorize sickening lot of stuff that doesn't help in the survival in this
society...all the blah blahs...
Bali was great....real great... The nice beach...and snorkelling area and
feeding the fishes...
The nice surfers' wet dream come true, where the waves keep coming
and coming unending together with the cool sea breeze...nice!
The cold deep in Ayung River while the few were staying on the rafting boat...
So many things! So fun...so relaxing....not forgetting the massages and spa I had
everyday there...simply gets me all bonded with the bed well at night....hahaha....
And coming home... I get to be a big purchaser for the company...
hahaha...imagine electronic and IT manufacturing companies like Toshiba,
Canon, Commax....all treating you like some king...taking all the effort and time
to entertain you and convince you that their product is better....hohoho....sweet!
Friday....8th of June...the moment of truth...
I FREAKIN' CLEARED UNIVERSITY ALREADY!!!!!! WOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
I seriously thought I was going to fail 3 modules out of the 8 that I was dealing with...
coz I was only able to do 1 1/2 Qn to 2 Qns max...the rest of it was trying my luck and
putting down my own understanding without even solving any of the problems....
Anyway....it's prep for convocation now and into the workforce!
The target for the year would be aiming and hitting the 20mil deal and more to come!!!
GoGoGo!!!!
Gotta prove myself in 4 months...sitting in the position of Asst Manager...stress....
But hey this is good stress...
Hahahaaaa....
Monday! off to be an Army fighting machine once again!!!....for 5 days! hahaha....
Friday, June 01, 2007
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Wow! today was a rush! Phew!...
Went to scout on IT stuff at the PC show...Goodness! it was so crowded.
people were madness trying to push their way through.
I got pissed with a few and I think a guy got it from me....
Pushing his wah behind me, til I lost my temper and turned around
confronting him.
was on the verge of giving him a choke slam damn it...
oh well...
Spent a hundred odd on Storage utilities today....and some mini-SDs for friends.
After which I came home and took my mum's place in the kitchen while she went
to switch off with her old friends...
Slaughtered 2 fishes that were catches from the pond on wednesday by a family friend.
Got it seasoned and good for the grill...
Then had to prepare for pasta... all fit for the table at dinner time...
Darn dealing with the fish was so much problem when having the wrong tools.
And with nobody's assistance. I can feel why my mum sometimes gets so pissed
when she has to rush while everyone else ...aka my siblings sitting around
the place and minding their own business and just waiting for the meal to be
done. But I guess at least when I call out for them, I don't need to push off
for a second shout and they report to me in the kitchen....hohoho...
then that's not so bad lah...
I wish they can just try to help around sometimes and need not to have my mum calling for help.
By then she's already all boiling inside already.
I hope for more time to just take over her duties for awhile to let her go relax alittle...
Maybe on my first pay I'd just get a spa package for she and my dad to let them both go soothen down
themselves and take a break...
The rest will be old enough to deal with their stuff....meals and transport altogether....
they are 15yrs old and above already...so it's time my parents give themselves some time together.
Anyway today... I just got done with dinner and sweep my mum upstairs and got her away from
the maid, before the maid does some shitty thing to anger her and boil her blood.
the maid has been madness for the few months...it's like having her around is giving us more worries
and more work to deal with. things weren't clean, the clothes iron almost burnt the whole of my table...
the tables were never cleaned well...everything wasn't done properly to the bare minimum required at all!
And we've all been teaching her for months and she just doesn't bother at all...
My parents are are gona bat her all the way back to Indo once the new one is confirmed...
hope that time comes faster!
1 more day to Bali Day!!!
Went to scout on IT stuff at the PC show...Goodness! it was so crowded.
people were madness trying to push their way through.
I got pissed with a few and I think a guy got it from me....
Pushing his wah behind me, til I lost my temper and turned around
confronting him.
was on the verge of giving him a choke slam damn it...
oh well...
Spent a hundred odd on Storage utilities today....and some mini-SDs for friends.
After which I came home and took my mum's place in the kitchen while she went
to switch off with her old friends...
Slaughtered 2 fishes that were catches from the pond on wednesday by a family friend.
Got it seasoned and good for the grill...
Then had to prepare for pasta... all fit for the table at dinner time...
Darn dealing with the fish was so much problem when having the wrong tools.
And with nobody's assistance. I can feel why my mum sometimes gets so pissed
when she has to rush while everyone else ...aka my siblings sitting around
the place and minding their own business and just waiting for the meal to be
done. But I guess at least when I call out for them, I don't need to push off
for a second shout and they report to me in the kitchen....hohoho...
then that's not so bad lah...
I wish they can just try to help around sometimes and need not to have my mum calling for help.
By then she's already all boiling inside already.
I hope for more time to just take over her duties for awhile to let her go relax alittle...
Maybe on my first pay I'd just get a spa package for she and my dad to let them both go soothen down
themselves and take a break...
The rest will be old enough to deal with their stuff....meals and transport altogether....
they are 15yrs old and above already...so it's time my parents give themselves some time together.
Anyway today... I just got done with dinner and sweep my mum upstairs and got her away from
the maid, before the maid does some shitty thing to anger her and boil her blood.
the maid has been madness for the few months...it's like having her around is giving us more worries
and more work to deal with. things weren't clean, the clothes iron almost burnt the whole of my table...
the tables were never cleaned well...everything wasn't done properly to the bare minimum required at all!
And we've all been teaching her for months and she just doesn't bother at all...
My parents are are gona bat her all the way back to Indo once the new one is confirmed...
hope that time comes faster!
1 more day to Bali Day!!!
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Oh man....counting down...2 more days...
and I'm off!
hohoho....Surf the big waves....
Taking some time to ponder on what I want out of life...
once again...
as I always do....hahahaha
Well...
Career....about there...
just need to work on that make it florish...and hit the big target of the year....
Studies....aiyah...heck it already....it's the past...
home....I'll find it and plan when I'll think of buying one...
Car...Oh...I think soon when I get the certifications by the next quarter...
Girlfriend....OMG....now that one...hmmm....haven't thought of yet. hahaha
It's a tough one.
Maybe wait and see...and the almighty being might just allow the chance to hit...
Also...
I'm feeling my temper heating up somehow...not sure why...
but, I seem to begin to get frustrated when people do odd and persistant things
to me... be it verbal, physical...whatever... the explosion will come.
Guess I really need the holiday!
and I'm off!
hohoho....Surf the big waves....
Taking some time to ponder on what I want out of life...
once again...
as I always do....hahahaha
Well...
Career....about there...
just need to work on that make it florish...and hit the big target of the year....
Studies....aiyah...heck it already....it's the past...
home....I'll find it and plan when I'll think of buying one...
Car...Oh...I think soon when I get the certifications by the next quarter...
Girlfriend....OMG....now that one...hmmm....haven't thought of yet. hahaha
It's a tough one.
Maybe wait and see...and the almighty being might just allow the chance to hit...
Also...
I'm feeling my temper heating up somehow...not sure why...
but, I seem to begin to get frustrated when people do odd and persistant things
to me... be it verbal, physical...whatever... the explosion will come.
Guess I really need the holiday!
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
"To be able to blame yourself for the mistakes made in life
but yet to be forward looking"
Is an enlightenment that will carry one beyond the the line of
norm abilities...
"To know what you want to achieve in life and to fight for it
in the best possible way with integrity" is one who holds strong determination
and will.
My future...in my line...
To get what I want...
I'll SWEAT it out!
For a better life, for a better future...
For the things I want and the place I wanna be....
Sell
With
Every
Available
Technique
but yet to be forward looking"
Is an enlightenment that will carry one beyond the the line of
norm abilities...
"To know what you want to achieve in life and to fight for it
in the best possible way with integrity" is one who holds strong determination
and will.
My future...in my line...
To get what I want...
I'll SWEAT it out!
For a better life, for a better future...
For the things I want and the place I wanna be....
Sell
With
Every
Available
Technique
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Saturday....went for Novena....
after centuries since the last time I did so...
Realised I couldn't follow what they were doing....
wasn't too sure of the procedures so just prayed the way I would....
well that's so me lah....hohoho....
I'm so looking forward to the coming Saturday.....
Will then fly off to Bali...finally for a short short holiday....
Get out of the system awhile...
and out of the projects for free lance too....need a break before
I hardcore start on my work....my career.....
the burst into the building of Kenneth Empire!
hahahahaa....
after centuries since the last time I did so...
Realised I couldn't follow what they were doing....
wasn't too sure of the procedures so just prayed the way I would....
well that's so me lah....hohoho....
I'm so looking forward to the coming Saturday.....
Will then fly off to Bali...finally for a short short holiday....
Get out of the system awhile...
and out of the projects for free lance too....need a break before
I hardcore start on my work....my career.....
the burst into the building of Kenneth Empire!
hahahahaa....
Monday, May 21, 2007
Back in goumet Mood...thus a treat for all
The feeling of sharing is good...
to the belated celebration for mother's day...
for my mum and grandma...
And for the good feeling of getting out of NTU.
HOHOHO....
The best feeling comes when I see people enjoying what I've
spent the day preparing for them...and set 2 days to plan and buy the stuff for cooking....
All my first time tests...(yet to perfect it fit for bigger mass and newbie people)...
Thanks to my honoured guinea pigs. lol.
=>Chicken Fajita with multigrain tortilla
=>Cajun grilled King Prawns with mango salsa
=>Spanish seafood backed rice
=>Swedish meatballs with cranberry jelly sauce and beef gravy cream sauce.
(my big tryout...was afraid it fails and have to finish the whole 1kg myself)
=>Balsamic Vinegar dressing salad with olive and garlic croutons
=>Clam Chowder
=>Chilled Mango Cheese cake
All in good time...all in good time...
Next....hmm....I duno...greek?....American?...
Anyway I hope everyone truely enjoyed the food...as much as I enjoyed cooking!
to the belated celebration for mother's day...
for my mum and grandma...
And for the good feeling of getting out of NTU.
HOHOHO....
The best feeling comes when I see people enjoying what I've
spent the day preparing for them...and set 2 days to plan and buy the stuff for cooking....
All my first time tests...(yet to perfect it fit for bigger mass and newbie people)...
Thanks to my honoured guinea pigs. lol.
=>Chicken Fajita with multigrain tortilla
=>Cajun grilled King Prawns with mango salsa
=>Spanish seafood backed rice
=>Swedish meatballs with cranberry jelly sauce and beef gravy cream sauce.
(my big tryout...was afraid it fails and have to finish the whole 1kg myself)
=>Balsamic Vinegar dressing salad with olive and garlic croutons
=>Clam Chowder
=>Chilled Mango Cheese cake
All in good time...all in good time...
Next....hmm....I duno...greek?....American?...
Anyway I hope everyone truely enjoyed the food...as much as I enjoyed cooking!
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Sometimes I wonder what should I really do...
there are somethings in life that probably I just need to let it flow through...
and just not bother about too much...
But yet.. how would I know what those things really are?
Damn...such feelings are jack shit!
Feeling somehow that I've been in a way forced to come to a point
where I just don't wanna care so much about some stuff...and just let be...
stick on to what I've been with and the road I've travelled along...
just praying for the well being of my freakin' results...(which I'm so afraid to see actually)
Argh!!!
there are somethings in life that probably I just need to let it flow through...
and just not bother about too much...
But yet.. how would I know what those things really are?
Damn...such feelings are jack shit!
Feeling somehow that I've been in a way forced to come to a point
where I just don't wanna care so much about some stuff...and just let be...
stick on to what I've been with and the road I've travelled along...
just praying for the well being of my freakin' results...(which I'm so afraid to see actually)
Argh!!!
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Sunday, May 13, 2007
I've been spending days if not many years wondering...
WHY....
why is there division of different religion even when there is a common believe
of the same almighty being...
I'm a catholic...
born into and reaffirmed at the age of 14...
gotten in and out of faith...
basically, because I question...
But how did the religion catholic come about actually?
well....
Catholic is a term derived from latin or greek....meaning 'universal' or general.
Most Reformation and post-Reformation Churches use the term Catholic to refer to the belief that all Christians are part of one Church, regardless of denominational divisions. It is in line with this interpretation, which applies the word "catholic"/"universal" to no one denomination, that they understand the phrase "One Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church" in the Nicene Creed, the phrase "the catholic faith" in the Athanasian Creed, and the phrase "holy catholic church" in the Apostles' Creed.
The term is used also to mean those Christian Churches which maintain that their Episcopate can be traced unbrokenly back to the Apostles, and consider themselves part of a broad catholic (or universal) body of believers.
I guess the only difference between Catholics and the Christians we have today is very much the method of teachings and following of the bible and one being universal, pays respect to the mother of God and pray directly to the almighty while the other only deals with direct communication. Isn't it afterall how humans interpret history and literature?... And if there are common believers, they form a new congregation of themselves and spread the very same words of the bible...
But how do each and every christians differ?....Methodist, presby, charismastics...blah blah blah...etc..?
Well I don't know...seems like all a complicated issue...
Sometimes it's a pain thinking about it.
I hate these differences.
Like I just respect all, whatever and however they see as respect as right...
am I still going to hell for that?...
WHY....
why is there division of different religion even when there is a common believe
of the same almighty being...
I'm a catholic...
born into and reaffirmed at the age of 14...
gotten in and out of faith...
basically, because I question...
But how did the religion catholic come about actually?
well....
Catholic is a term derived from latin or greek....meaning 'universal' or general.
Most Reformation and post-Reformation Churches use the term Catholic to refer to the belief that all Christians are part of one Church, regardless of denominational divisions. It is in line with this interpretation, which applies the word "catholic"/"universal" to no one denomination, that they understand the phrase "One Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church" in the Nicene Creed, the phrase "the catholic faith" in the Athanasian Creed, and the phrase "holy catholic church" in the Apostles' Creed.
The term is used also to mean those Christian Churches which maintain that their Episcopate can be traced unbrokenly back to the Apostles, and consider themselves part of a broad catholic (or universal) body of believers.
I guess the only difference between Catholics and the Christians we have today is very much the method of teachings and following of the bible and one being universal, pays respect to the mother of God and pray directly to the almighty while the other only deals with direct communication. Isn't it afterall how humans interpret history and literature?... And if there are common believers, they form a new congregation of themselves and spread the very same words of the bible...
But how do each and every christians differ?....Methodist, presby, charismastics...blah blah blah...etc..?
Well I don't know...seems like all a complicated issue...
Sometimes it's a pain thinking about it.
I hate these differences.
Like I just respect all, whatever and however they see as respect as right...
am I still going to hell for that?...
Là I un coeur brisé,
pour vous valable,
dans toute la franchise,
vous sont spécial toujours.
Vous avoir détruit de telles voies,
a encore été le plus non,
a encore été le plus non désiré,
mais destiné il a été.
Peut-être un jour je comprendrais.
Peut-être un jour je viendrais
dans la recherche de vous quand j'ai vu la lumière sur quelques
Avec toutes les choses qui est noir,
vous avez semblé une combinaison plus blanche.
Je vois les deux couleurs et les embrasse toutes de vous.
Une image de vous dans mon esprit,
belle pourtant elle reste.
pour vous valable,
dans toute la franchise,
vous sont spécial toujours.
Vous avoir détruit de telles voies,
a encore été le plus non,
a encore été le plus non désiré,
mais destiné il a été.
Peut-être un jour je comprendrais.
Peut-être un jour je viendrais
dans la recherche de vous quand j'ai vu la lumière sur quelques
Avec toutes les choses qui est noir,
vous avez semblé une combinaison plus blanche.
Je vois les deux couleurs et les embrasse toutes de vous.
Une image de vous dans mon esprit,
belle pourtant elle reste.
Friday, May 11, 2007
I lay before the stage of my own life...
a play I began 26 years since I saw light.
Wonderin' oh what's grave importance and what's not.
How did I come to such a point where I just want to be with
somebody yet I can't...
not because there ain't attraction...
not because there is some character mismatch...
not because we have life's grave differences we can't stand about each other...
Yet because of how religion in this world fools us...
How is it that even honouring the same supreme being
could be made so different by humans upon this sickening earth...?
How is it that simply living a life together isn't just it?...
It's either life expectations level differences or
the believe of meeting our maker on judgement day clashes
that has scared my emotional self... year by year....
one by one...
Making me thus so fed up...
Frustration is boiling within...
like some may say a singleton equates freedom
but I see a proper pair brings joy...
There see mine I do not...
sick and tired...
I just hope I won't grow into some selfish being
that I just have enough of all these issues to think about and handle...
that I'd want nothing anymore...
bring a scorpion filled mind...
pains and aches unending...
Where thus I go?
journey my OWN path...
my OWN way...
have my OWN talk...?...
I wish someone just go alter the scripts to my play...
a play I began 26 years since I saw light.
Wonderin' oh what's grave importance and what's not.
How did I come to such a point where I just want to be with
somebody yet I can't...
not because there ain't attraction...
not because there is some character mismatch...
not because we have life's grave differences we can't stand about each other...
Yet because of how religion in this world fools us...
How is it that even honouring the same supreme being
could be made so different by humans upon this sickening earth...?
How is it that simply living a life together isn't just it?...
It's either life expectations level differences or
the believe of meeting our maker on judgement day clashes
that has scared my emotional self... year by year....
one by one...
Making me thus so fed up...
Frustration is boiling within...
like some may say a singleton equates freedom
but I see a proper pair brings joy...
There see mine I do not...
sick and tired...
I just hope I won't grow into some selfish being
that I just have enough of all these issues to think about and handle...
that I'd want nothing anymore...
bring a scorpion filled mind...
pains and aches unending...
Where thus I go?
journey my OWN path...
my OWN way...
have my OWN talk...?...
I wish someone just go alter the scripts to my play...
Monday, May 07, 2007
Finally... FYP ended....the final presentation done...
weird but true...my supervisor who once threatened to fail me...
actually started aiding me during the firing of Q&A...
helped me explain the constrains and why I shouldn't be blamed so much on
getting all the fundamentals right...and all the memory work...
Coz to him...it's now very obvious that THE KENNETH CHAN IS A VERY BUSY MAN!!!
and that THE BRAIN ISN'T JUST FOR MEMORY WORK!!! other SURVIVAL ANALYSIS PROVE TO BE
OF HIGHER IMPORTANCE!...
hahahaaaa....
Oh well...
that phase....I hope it's all over now....
Something disturbs me very much....
sigh...why must there be a division of different denominations of christianity!!!!???
Can't there be something just common....?
Afterall...isn't it God we're all talking about?....the same God isn't it?....
What's with the world mama?....
A part of me feels torn....
to a person I feel quite abit for...
but yet...a line drawn by religion....I can't see the reason to cross...
I only see respect on what each other believes in...
sigh...
But reality bites so hard sometimes....
so painful...
Father! please show me a sign....a way...
it's like torn between a religion I was born into for 26yrs of my life...and my character....then towards something that is wholely new by someone I feel for....
feels like I'm suddenly not too sure what I'm gona think anymore...
it's wrecking me in a way...
And God I need to find a way to build me up....
Help me...
What's thy will really?...
I can't be toyed again....
your son is begging...
weird but true...my supervisor who once threatened to fail me...
actually started aiding me during the firing of Q&A...
helped me explain the constrains and why I shouldn't be blamed so much on
getting all the fundamentals right...and all the memory work...
Coz to him...it's now very obvious that THE KENNETH CHAN IS A VERY BUSY MAN!!!
and that THE BRAIN ISN'T JUST FOR MEMORY WORK!!! other SURVIVAL ANALYSIS PROVE TO BE
OF HIGHER IMPORTANCE!...
hahahaaaa....
Oh well...
that phase....I hope it's all over now....
Something disturbs me very much....
sigh...why must there be a division of different denominations of christianity!!!!???
Can't there be something just common....?
Afterall...isn't it God we're all talking about?....the same God isn't it?....
What's with the world mama?....
A part of me feels torn....
to a person I feel quite abit for...
but yet...a line drawn by religion....I can't see the reason to cross...
I only see respect on what each other believes in...
sigh...
But reality bites so hard sometimes....
so painful...
Father! please show me a sign....a way...
it's like torn between a religion I was born into for 26yrs of my life...and my character....then towards something that is wholely new by someone I feel for....
feels like I'm suddenly not too sure what I'm gona think anymore...
it's wrecking me in a way...
And God I need to find a way to build me up....
Help me...
What's thy will really?...
I can't be toyed again....
your son is begging...
Thursday, May 03, 2007
It totally feels so good without needing to have the thought of having any exams today...
no papers on my table...
no equation memory list...
No stupid professors to see with their look on theif faces like they are like kings of the exam hall...
and our fate lies within their hands....
No more!!!!
but yesterday....was a totally killer paper...
all my friends were clueless and totally had no experience in those kinda questions given...
even after doing past yr's paper...
doing all the tutorials...
were still unable to get it done with much confidence...
OMG...but what the heck...it's over and I can't be bothered to leave any brain juice on for it.
just relax my brain for now...
no papers on my table...
no equation memory list...
No stupid professors to see with their look on theif faces like they are like kings of the exam hall...
and our fate lies within their hands....
No more!!!!
but yesterday....was a totally killer paper...
all my friends were clueless and totally had no experience in those kinda questions given...
even after doing past yr's paper...
doing all the tutorials...
were still unable to get it done with much confidence...
OMG...but what the heck...it's over and I can't be bothered to leave any brain juice on for it.
just relax my brain for now...
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
In 6hrs
In 6hrs...
I'm a free man...
Free from the torture of academic lock ups...
free from huge load of memory drag...
free from the place where they call NTU...
a place of total impractical studies...
really 90% life survival studies of whatever field you enter into...
In 6hrs...
the end of student life...
and the dawn of a new building of an empire...
there I'll rise...
I'm a free man...
Free from the torture of academic lock ups...
free from huge load of memory drag...
free from the place where they call NTU...
a place of total impractical studies...
really 90% life survival studies of whatever field you enter into...
In 6hrs...
the end of student life...
and the dawn of a new building of an empire...
there I'll rise...
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
OH what in the world is going on???
Hearing from some how they're being split apart from the person dear to them
mainly due to 2 factors...
1) Religion
2) History aka. pass r/s
Totally not good...
Sometimes I sit and think...
Why is it that religion has to be some issue when it comes to being together...
when it comes to being in a r/s. Isn't it most important how both feel for each other?
How the character binds each other?
Where both are great with each other...
understands each other...feels secure and warmth in the presence of each other...
feels the nice feeling of being together....
but due to Religion... to that difference, they can't be together...
Even within the same belief yet different denomination...there is still problem...
How is it that religions call for a division of type and other than calling for unity of all human race?
It's rather human's selfish interpretation of writings to formulate their own group...
for control...and thus leading to a 'tradition' or a 'custom' people follow.
How true those 'words of wisdom' are...all lies with the mouth of the founder...
Really to me...it doesn't matter which religion I've to deal with...
The one thing I've always believed... God gave us the freedom, we should give others
the freedom to choose where they wanna go....who they wanna follow. Still, no matter
what the case is...he still loves us the same. Shan't others from other groups, and we're already
not abiding by one of the law of the 10 commandments... "Love your neighbour...blah blah blah"
Respect what other people believe in... that's the most important...
If only the world can jolly well understand this and earth... will be much much more peaceful...
Sad to say....sometimes a cross of boundaries can cause an outrage for war... a no good excuse they call
a 'religious war'....
And history?... One changes and forms a character...good or bad...is mainly from experiences.
Happy are those who have experienced and change for the better...
Having many pass r/s doesn't equate to the person being a horrible player of emotions....
We grow...we learn...we fall and we get up once more...
Very often, we'd love to say that he/she is my first love...but sometimes...due to the infinite possibilities
of changes around us... is that ever possible to hit the target on the first try?....
one in a million I say...
if you've gotten that...then you're lucky....good for you.
But along the way I've come to understand, you'll never know a person until you're in a r/s with the person...
people are way different when being put in different situations...
different at friends,
different as working partners,
different as playmates,
different as a girlfriend/boyfriend
different as husband/wife
different as brother/sister....etc...
Being in a r/s with one...will bring you into another of his/her realm...where we see
how they react as a son/daughter...brother/sister...friends to others and most of all, girlfriend/boyfriend...
and thus give us an idea on how he/she is like as a husband/wife...
So...walk into it...and if it fails...at least you've tried and given a shot at it...
rather than regretting for life that it could've been the one but yet you gave the chance away...
Sadly for those who see past history as a grief obstacle in getting into a r/s with the other...
they'll never get give take those chances and miss out on the possibilities...
Actually...having gone through so many r/s... it only gives me a better understanding of what I want
in my partner... a better idea on how to deal with the other...
How best to treat a girl and most of the time how to interpret ambiguous verbal meanings...
If that's not a good thing... then oh crap... I'm a gonner...
mainly due to 2 factors...
1) Religion
2) History aka. pass r/s
Totally not good...
Sometimes I sit and think...
Why is it that religion has to be some issue when it comes to being together...
when it comes to being in a r/s. Isn't it most important how both feel for each other?
How the character binds each other?
Where both are great with each other...
understands each other...feels secure and warmth in the presence of each other...
feels the nice feeling of being together....
but due to Religion... to that difference, they can't be together...
Even within the same belief yet different denomination...there is still problem...
How is it that religions call for a division of type and other than calling for unity of all human race?
It's rather human's selfish interpretation of writings to formulate their own group...
for control...and thus leading to a 'tradition' or a 'custom' people follow.
How true those 'words of wisdom' are...all lies with the mouth of the founder...
Really to me...it doesn't matter which religion I've to deal with...
The one thing I've always believed... God gave us the freedom, we should give others
the freedom to choose where they wanna go....who they wanna follow. Still, no matter
what the case is...he still loves us the same. Shan't others from other groups, and we're already
not abiding by one of the law of the 10 commandments... "Love your neighbour...blah blah blah"
Respect what other people believe in... that's the most important...
If only the world can jolly well understand this and earth... will be much much more peaceful...
Sad to say....sometimes a cross of boundaries can cause an outrage for war... a no good excuse they call
a 'religious war'....
And history?... One changes and forms a character...good or bad...is mainly from experiences.
Happy are those who have experienced and change for the better...
Having many pass r/s doesn't equate to the person being a horrible player of emotions....
We grow...we learn...we fall and we get up once more...
Very often, we'd love to say that he/she is my first love...but sometimes...due to the infinite possibilities
of changes around us... is that ever possible to hit the target on the first try?....
one in a million I say...
if you've gotten that...then you're lucky....good for you.
But along the way I've come to understand, you'll never know a person until you're in a r/s with the person...
people are way different when being put in different situations...
different at friends,
different as working partners,
different as playmates,
different as a girlfriend/boyfriend
different as husband/wife
different as brother/sister....etc...
Being in a r/s with one...will bring you into another of his/her realm...where we see
how they react as a son/daughter...brother/sister...friends to others and most of all, girlfriend/boyfriend...
and thus give us an idea on how he/she is like as a husband/wife...
So...walk into it...and if it fails...at least you've tried and given a shot at it...
rather than regretting for life that it could've been the one but yet you gave the chance away...
Sadly for those who see past history as a grief obstacle in getting into a r/s with the other...
they'll never get give take those chances and miss out on the possibilities...
Actually...having gone through so many r/s... it only gives me a better understanding of what I want
in my partner... a better idea on how to deal with the other...
How best to treat a girl and most of the time how to interpret ambiguous verbal meanings...
If that's not a good thing... then oh crap... I'm a gonner...
Sunday, April 29, 2007
The Top goals of '07
3 goals... and it's be accomplished by end 2007....
1) Career : set my footage and prove my worth in operations and biz
2) my darn civilian car license (and then the car given to me by the company...and hopefully save for an Audi R8 and a nice house)
3)Search and target possible candidates for "life partner" analysis....hahahaa.......
Oh finally the last goal that will be put into motion once I end exams....
build back fitness to man-of-steel standard....going in for reservice in June and don't wanna be looking like some slack shitty officer just for name sake....
and of course....Paul and Richie....rmb our goal of getting on the next marathon?....yah....we better head off with the training again....hahahaa...if not we probably die
this time.....I shouldn't be anywhere behind....lol....ample training unlike the last time....no training...after exams and off I go for the run...madness...almost died.
1) Career : set my footage and prove my worth in operations and biz
2) my darn civilian car license (and then the car given to me by the company...and hopefully save for an Audi R8 and a nice house)
3)Search and target possible candidates for "life partner" analysis....hahahaa.......
Oh finally the last goal that will be put into motion once I end exams....
build back fitness to man-of-steel standard....going in for reservice in June and don't wanna be looking like some slack shitty officer just for name sake....
and of course....Paul and Richie....rmb our goal of getting on the next marathon?....yah....we better head off with the training again....hahahaa...if not we probably die
this time.....I shouldn't be anywhere behind....lol....ample training unlike the last time....no training...after exams and off I go for the run...madness...almost died.
Went to chruch today...
Realised something really true today...
Marriage is yet another vocation....
A sacred vocation that both sides have to be opened to one another
to feel the love...
to share with each other the kind of person each of them are...
to share the life together...
That alone, isn't something easy at all...
Very often we get trapped in our own world...
our own space that we'd never wanna change.
Coz it's the very way we want it to be....the very vision we see it to be
and how we'd have it.
But when it comes to sharing a life with another, it's all a breaking down of our own beliefs
and a construction of a whole new set together with another person.
And the construction...is a process that isn't gona be easy...
Collaboration....compromise...hard work...understanding...and lots of other things.
Holding on strong to that someone... is yet the most important...
esp when in this present society, either sides....men and women the same sway...
taking a walk to the forbidden fruits...and commit something they'd regret doing
but have already done so...no turning back on it...just repent.
But it's already a scar.
Here I stand...by myself...
I've yet to decide on which way to walk to...
like a clearing fog...
just like I'd wanna settle, but yet after being through so many...
I've got this fear that I'll fall upon a relationship that will be so hard to sustain.
That somehow cripples...
That for one is the worry that I've always been having....
That's the thing that always gotten me thinking before I even say yes and given myself the go ahead.
I've got a good appetite for risk but when it comes to this... I don't...
Somehow I just can't anymore...
Tired maybe...just wanna settle for someone I'd live with through my life...
happily.
Just pray on it...
Just hope on it...
Just search and ponder...
one in mind but yet to wonder abt...
I guess time will tell...
time spent to understand and realise.
that...like I said before...will be part of my plans after exams...
Realised something really true today...
Marriage is yet another vocation....
A sacred vocation that both sides have to be opened to one another
to feel the love...
to share with each other the kind of person each of them are...
to share the life together...
That alone, isn't something easy at all...
Very often we get trapped in our own world...
our own space that we'd never wanna change.
Coz it's the very way we want it to be....the very vision we see it to be
and how we'd have it.
But when it comes to sharing a life with another, it's all a breaking down of our own beliefs
and a construction of a whole new set together with another person.
And the construction...is a process that isn't gona be easy...
Collaboration....compromise...hard work...understanding...and lots of other things.
Holding on strong to that someone... is yet the most important...
esp when in this present society, either sides....men and women the same sway...
taking a walk to the forbidden fruits...and commit something they'd regret doing
but have already done so...no turning back on it...just repent.
But it's already a scar.
Here I stand...by myself...
I've yet to decide on which way to walk to...
like a clearing fog...
just like I'd wanna settle, but yet after being through so many...
I've got this fear that I'll fall upon a relationship that will be so hard to sustain.
That somehow cripples...
That for one is the worry that I've always been having....
That's the thing that always gotten me thinking before I even say yes and given myself the go ahead.
I've got a good appetite for risk but when it comes to this... I don't...
Somehow I just can't anymore...
Tired maybe...just wanna settle for someone I'd live with through my life...
happily.
Just pray on it...
Just hope on it...
Just search and ponder...
one in mind but yet to wonder abt...
I guess time will tell...
time spent to understand and realise.
that...like I said before...will be part of my plans after exams...
Saturday, April 28, 2007
A horrible 2 weeks...but a good break came after 6 papers...
very nice...
Buddy felix came visiting for supper...
then the next after packing some stuff back home...
met the good frenz of hall 10 at Wine Network to chill...
and the following day....
today actually...
out since morning for rock climbing with ZQ...
yeh yeh though we caught the wrong bus to SAFRA...
but it was still a joy ride around wasn't?...
Just good to waste a day away some times...
Just doing things and taking your time....
Got a big glass Jar for a fish tank at ikea....hahaa....
next would be to find a nice good filter and pump...
All before shifting my fishes over.
Oh the Swedish meat balls were great....great great....hahaha...
But think I over ordered...lucking thing I was sharing if not I'd be swedish meanball too...
Will try making one of these days...
Think about that after the last paper....
Tonite...I'm good to go again....and swing off to my readings
for the last...
Biomedical Signal Processing...
Let's go!
very nice...
Buddy felix came visiting for supper...
then the next after packing some stuff back home...
met the good frenz of hall 10 at Wine Network to chill...
and the following day....
today actually...
out since morning for rock climbing with ZQ...
yeh yeh though we caught the wrong bus to SAFRA...
but it was still a joy ride around wasn't?...
Just good to waste a day away some times...
Just doing things and taking your time....
Got a big glass Jar for a fish tank at ikea....hahaa....
next would be to find a nice good filter and pump...
All before shifting my fishes over.
Oh the Swedish meat balls were great....great great....hahaha...
But think I over ordered...lucking thing I was sharing if not I'd be swedish meanball too...
Will try making one of these days...
Think about that after the last paper....
Tonite...I'm good to go again....and swing off to my readings
for the last...
Biomedical Signal Processing...
Let's go!
In the day....
whilst the day dreaming and the do nothings when i just couldn't study....
I got reminded of a glacier experience scary enough to shake me off my guts....
Duh....
Stalled on ice, dizzy, only slightly aware of the massive glacier that sloped away at a 35-degree angle for 2500 feet beneath my toes. My headache...or yes my headache had gotten worse in the preceding hours. The picturesque landscape of snow fields and icy cliffs all around me had compounded to a single image...
I watched the ice crowd my field of vision as I fell until my head hit the left footprint with a loud thud...
And just not far awway I heard the rope group calling "Falling" following sound of ice axes thrusting desperately into the mountain...
And thereafter...the nightmare began....
a situation where my symtoms were getting worse...and death was likely in the forecast...
the only solution was seemingly turn back before I hit summit...
But maybe it was me....
too courageous to quit...
too much to say I'd give up....
I just had to go for it and give it a bamm!
When you come to such a death defying moment...
you'd find how much your apetite for risk and adrenaline rush is like...
You wanna feel it...feel it at Mt Shasta...
slog your way to the Avalanche Gluch... fight death....fight fear and overcome yourself....
Makes you feel like an accomplished person in the world already....better than a million bucks...
Try tripping down to california then...find yourself!
=)
whilst the day dreaming and the do nothings when i just couldn't study....
I got reminded of a glacier experience scary enough to shake me off my guts....
Duh....
Stalled on ice, dizzy, only slightly aware of the massive glacier that sloped away at a 35-degree angle for 2500 feet beneath my toes. My headache...or yes my headache had gotten worse in the preceding hours. The picturesque landscape of snow fields and icy cliffs all around me had compounded to a single image...
I watched the ice crowd my field of vision as I fell until my head hit the left footprint with a loud thud...
And just not far awway I heard the rope group calling "Falling" following sound of ice axes thrusting desperately into the mountain...
And thereafter...the nightmare began....
a situation where my symtoms were getting worse...and death was likely in the forecast...
the only solution was seemingly turn back before I hit summit...
But maybe it was me....
too courageous to quit...
too much to say I'd give up....
I just had to go for it and give it a bamm!
When you come to such a death defying moment...
you'd find how much your apetite for risk and adrenaline rush is like...
You wanna feel it...feel it at Mt Shasta...
slog your way to the Avalanche Gluch... fight death....fight fear and overcome yourself....
Makes you feel like an accomplished person in the world already....better than a million bucks...
Try tripping down to california then...find yourself!
=)
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
3 more to go...
just 3 more to go!!!
An that's the end of this pain...
the usual bi-yearly pain I've been dreadfully going through.
Academic stuff isn't for me...
not me at all...
Be operational...be working...
be a survivor out there...
a hunter...a seeker...
a leader...
just not be a student...
I'd die...
like I feel I am....just dying...in the books...piling over me...
the notes giving paper cuts after paper cuts...
just 3 more to go!!!
the 3 great heavy ones that requires at least 3 solid days of studying...
So darn tired when you've got to match against people who have 7 days to study for a module while u've got only 2..
maybe less than that...time is shared with another set coming on back to back...
finishing papers in the exams...is totally ecstatic...
even better than....erhmmm....ahemm...well..
just a good feeling...
Just don't bother about the results...
GIVE ME A PASS IS ALL I WANT!!!
just 3 more to go!!!
An that's the end of this pain...
the usual bi-yearly pain I've been dreadfully going through.
Academic stuff isn't for me...
not me at all...
Be operational...be working...
be a survivor out there...
a hunter...a seeker...
a leader...
just not be a student...
I'd die...
like I feel I am....just dying...in the books...piling over me...
the notes giving paper cuts after paper cuts...
just 3 more to go!!!
the 3 great heavy ones that requires at least 3 solid days of studying...
So darn tired when you've got to match against people who have 7 days to study for a module while u've got only 2..
maybe less than that...time is shared with another set coming on back to back...
finishing papers in the exams...is totally ecstatic...
even better than....erhmmm....ahemm...well..
just a good feeling...
Just don't bother about the results...
GIVE ME A PASS IS ALL I WANT!!!
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Damn....!!!
Weird weird dream!
Suddenly I had something new...flashing in my 1hr+ rest time...
was so real that it was kinda possible for confusion and wrong move...
Out of God knows what senario...Dreamt I started kissing someone...and when
she came waking me up when the room was all dark
I almost pulled her over to give a peck on the cheek!...
Lucky I stopped...
must be the busted brains in there...
Weird weird dream!
Suddenly I had something new...flashing in my 1hr+ rest time...
was so real that it was kinda possible for confusion and wrong move...
Out of God knows what senario...Dreamt I started kissing someone...and when
she came waking me up when the room was all dark
I almost pulled her over to give a peck on the cheek!...
Lucky I stopped...
must be the busted brains in there...
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Isn't it strange the way things can change
The life that you lead turned on its head
Suddenly someone means more than you felt before
Her house and its yard turns into home
I'm sorry but i meant to say
many things along the way
so this ones for you
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache for you?
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache/and i hope its not too late
Have i told you i ache/Can i hold you and ache for you?
The time that it took writing words for my book
seems to have broken in half
The gate that i shut last time i got hurt
seems to have opened itself
Oh the world its spinning now its trying to catch me up
and tell me to appreciate the here and now
I'm sorry but i meant to say
many things along the way
so this ones for you
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache for you?
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache/and i hope its not too late
Have i told you i ache/Can i hold you and ache for you?
The life that you lead turned on its head
Suddenly someone means more than you felt before
Her house and its yard turns into home
I'm sorry but i meant to say
many things along the way
so this ones for you
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache for you?
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache/and i hope its not too late
Have i told you i ache/Can i hold you and ache for you?
The time that it took writing words for my book
seems to have broken in half
The gate that i shut last time i got hurt
seems to have opened itself
Oh the world its spinning now its trying to catch me up
and tell me to appreciate the here and now
I'm sorry but i meant to say
many things along the way
so this ones for you
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache for you?
Have i told you i ache
Have i told you i ache/and i hope its not too late
Have i told you i ache/Can i hold you and ache for you?
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
All I see are numbers...
making dark clouds in my mind...
2 sets of terror
a wicked dream come true...
perfect nightmare in the process...
But yet,
I shall stand even in weakness
of my tired legs...
the roar of my raging voice...
a call...
"Oh God Please aid me!"
I fall on my knees...
my sight darkens...
Just then,
The lightness of my heavy tired body
lifted into the light above...
There I found peace within...
an utter shut down of my system...
the wanting to think no more...
the desire of a stressless moment...
that was it...
making dark clouds in my mind...
2 sets of terror
a wicked dream come true...
perfect nightmare in the process...
But yet,
I shall stand even in weakness
of my tired legs...
the roar of my raging voice...
a call...
"Oh God Please aid me!"
I fall on my knees...
my sight darkens...
Just then,
The lightness of my heavy tired body
lifted into the light above...
There I found peace within...
an utter shut down of my system...
the wanting to think no more...
the desire of a stressless moment...
that was it...
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Oh damn I'm frustrated...it's 5.50am and I can't seem to sleep....exam at 9am...
Damn shit...am I screwed.
What is it this time?....
sigh...oh well... might as well let the insomnia come...
I'd rather that than having the wrong sleeping time!
argh!!!
All my buds seem to be dealing with some stuff at the moment...
Richie...having some decision to make...and feeling frustrated...
I think I might just know what it is actually...but hey...I think
there are some point where one has to stop and think if it's all worth it.
And worth is basically self perception...all up to you.
If it's a good thing and situations are seemingly strong enough to just let go
of what you have currently and just seek something of the unknown whilst purely having
the company of love...then go...
but having doubts...just alittle bit...think again then.
We all don't want you to make a decision you'd regret bro in future.
open the enclosed box and look what's inside before deeming it for keeps
or to the thrash... know thorougly what you are holding before letting go.
We have confidence you will make the right choice and the choice you'd be happy with.
We're just behind you...just look behind and a pat on your shoulder comes...take comfort
to that and just reflect and think things through.
Ja...leadership programme seems to be some draining thing...
like some adventure camp you put yourself through but this somehow stretches you
in someway that maybe I can't really see...but anyhow...I can see it's draining...
and I reckon it's very much about dealing with people.
I can't really comment much on this coz I've been one person who have been sadistic enough
to put myself through lotsa physical torture in tough trainings...mentally trying situations...
just to test myself and my limits...
Just that now...with academic stuff...hahaa I already know my limits...
I CAN'T STAND STUDYING CRAP!!! THAT DOESN'T APPLY TO DAILY SURVIVAL!!!!!
shit...I often think what in the world am I studying this and that for when I'm not going to use it in the long run...
horrible!
even the people teaching me are telling me that the educational system is horrid...
even the great scholars of distinctions and As...telling me at the end of the day, they realised that
they learnt nothing that helps them through the next step in life....survival...or should I say...
work.
oh well...don't think don't think...it's ending soon!
just try....
Paul...nice....all happy with his current position...that's great....toils and little struggles but I guess he is dealing great!
With all the holidays he just went for...and the one that we're all planning together....
hey everyone...we're gona have fun ya!
And buds...
The Kenneth is soon gona be out from the cage....!!!
VERY V E R Y SOOOOOOON!!!!!!!!
I'm so gona be over joyed...
somehow in some part of my brain I'm not even thinking what if I fail any subject this semester...
scary huh...coz basically I don't care already....all I know is that I'm just trying...
the darn stupid cert isn't important to me anymore...
not like the time I was tied up with SIA....with the whole thing about 2nd uppers and above...
pitting myself with those scholars of 1st class or having masters and pHd...
Afterall, at the end of the day...when I was there, they couldn't do many things that I could...
so much for being academically brilliant...
Recently I just told a professor that.... somehow I feel that he thinks he is darn great in this field and in his life
plainly because he is just being sheltered and in comfort of the educational protection...
like they all need him for the knowledge he has...
he is like someone in the stormy waters constantl having a float...since the day he started off being in the waters...
while those like me are rather the kind of people who simply get thrown into the waters and it's really up
to us to keep afloat...
and thus...when we find a float, we actually can live with or without it...while they probably not be able to
or to be fair...find great difficulties in doing so.
I got sick and tired when he kept thinking that students these days can't explain or get things so simple to him
into their head and remember it. These people can never bring themselves to the level of students...
Well...fortunately, there are still some good kind ones who are empathetic...
Damn shit...am I screwed.
What is it this time?....
sigh...oh well... might as well let the insomnia come...
I'd rather that than having the wrong sleeping time!
argh!!!
All my buds seem to be dealing with some stuff at the moment...
Richie...having some decision to make...and feeling frustrated...
I think I might just know what it is actually...but hey...I think
there are some point where one has to stop and think if it's all worth it.
And worth is basically self perception...all up to you.
If it's a good thing and situations are seemingly strong enough to just let go
of what you have currently and just seek something of the unknown whilst purely having
the company of love...then go...
but having doubts...just alittle bit...think again then.
We all don't want you to make a decision you'd regret bro in future.
open the enclosed box and look what's inside before deeming it for keeps
or to the thrash... know thorougly what you are holding before letting go.
We have confidence you will make the right choice and the choice you'd be happy with.
We're just behind you...just look behind and a pat on your shoulder comes...take comfort
to that and just reflect and think things through.
Ja...leadership programme seems to be some draining thing...
like some adventure camp you put yourself through but this somehow stretches you
in someway that maybe I can't really see...but anyhow...I can see it's draining...
and I reckon it's very much about dealing with people.
I can't really comment much on this coz I've been one person who have been sadistic enough
to put myself through lotsa physical torture in tough trainings...mentally trying situations...
just to test myself and my limits...
Just that now...with academic stuff...hahaa I already know my limits...
I CAN'T STAND STUDYING CRAP!!! THAT DOESN'T APPLY TO DAILY SURVIVAL!!!!!
shit...I often think what in the world am I studying this and that for when I'm not going to use it in the long run...
horrible!
even the people teaching me are telling me that the educational system is horrid...
even the great scholars of distinctions and As...telling me at the end of the day, they realised that
they learnt nothing that helps them through the next step in life....survival...or should I say...
work.
oh well...don't think don't think...it's ending soon!
just try....
Paul...nice....all happy with his current position...that's great....toils and little struggles but I guess he is dealing great!
With all the holidays he just went for...and the one that we're all planning together....
hey everyone...we're gona have fun ya!
And buds...
The Kenneth is soon gona be out from the cage....!!!
VERY V E R Y SOOOOOOON!!!!!!!!
I'm so gona be over joyed...
somehow in some part of my brain I'm not even thinking what if I fail any subject this semester...
scary huh...coz basically I don't care already....all I know is that I'm just trying...
the darn stupid cert isn't important to me anymore...
not like the time I was tied up with SIA....with the whole thing about 2nd uppers and above...
pitting myself with those scholars of 1st class or having masters and pHd...
Afterall, at the end of the day...when I was there, they couldn't do many things that I could...
so much for being academically brilliant...
Recently I just told a professor that.... somehow I feel that he thinks he is darn great in this field and in his life
plainly because he is just being sheltered and in comfort of the educational protection...
like they all need him for the knowledge he has...
he is like someone in the stormy waters constantl having a float...since the day he started off being in the waters...
while those like me are rather the kind of people who simply get thrown into the waters and it's really up
to us to keep afloat...
and thus...when we find a float, we actually can live with or without it...while they probably not be able to
or to be fair...find great difficulties in doing so.
I got sick and tired when he kept thinking that students these days can't explain or get things so simple to him
into their head and remember it. These people can never bring themselves to the level of students...
Well...fortunately, there are still some good kind ones who are empathetic...
Thursday, April 12, 2007
It's the last burst
oh yes it's the last burst...
Everyone's telling me the same thing...
Yes, coz it is...
But there I feel the frustration building...
suddenly all my years of studies were like becoming pointless
as I find myself in confusion...
with theories...
with what's right and what's wrong...
what's science and what's engineering...
what's answer and what's solution...
I just want to have a normal life...
doing my trade...
my insterest...
and build a family of my own....
that's all that matters....!!!
Last burst?...
oh yes it is...
but questions arising....
what has this place taught me at the end of the day?...
I'm not sure anymore...
practically....nothing useful...
oh yes it's the last burst...
Everyone's telling me the same thing...
Yes, coz it is...
But there I feel the frustration building...
suddenly all my years of studies were like becoming pointless
as I find myself in confusion...
with theories...
with what's right and what's wrong...
what's science and what's engineering...
what's answer and what's solution...
I just want to have a normal life...
doing my trade...
my insterest...
and build a family of my own....
that's all that matters....!!!
Last burst?...
oh yes it is...
but questions arising....
what has this place taught me at the end of the day?...
I'm not sure anymore...
practically....nothing useful...
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
how can this be.....
how can such a educational guide be such?
madness...
got hit by a sudden requirement to do a demonstration today and
had no time for prep... no time for reading up...
my mind was blank...
sucks sucks!!!
And who is he is say that I will be unemployed?...
Who is he?... just a professor in engineering and he can tell me that?
just coz he is assessing me I'll just give him face and keep my mouth shut and not retaliate...
not kill his pride the way I'd do to anybody on the streets...
sickening...madness
such horrid person...
who is he to dig into so much about what I'm going to do?
FOR YOUR INFO MISTER...IF YOU DIDN'T KNOW...
I'M ALREADY IN THE BIZ... I'M ALREADY ON THE GO...
I KNOW MY PRODUCT BETTER THAN ANY SHIT PROFESSORS CAN TALK ABOUT UNLESS THEY INVENTED THE DAMN THING!
Do this here....do this in the campus....but don't let me find you at my face one day asking me for quotations...
I'll make sure, you'll see many digits slapped at your face and you don't have a freaking choice on that...
unless you travel off shores far far away to get it...by then the costs all add up...
So much for saying you're trying to be fair..? c'mon....the other moderators were simply good and kind....you didn't know
you hit the billboards for being the asshold professor in the power division that all students hate to be under...
utterly no compassion when it comes to the system of education...comparing your intelligence with students...
why? is that because you have nobody else to compare yourself to?...
sucker...
if you find the things we do really complex...then you're just a piece of shit who got your many years of experience in the education into the waste....matching 10yrs of power experience to a student is totally a thing to look down upon....
Open your eyes....the people working around you feel the same way!!! just you....!
how can such a educational guide be such?
madness...
got hit by a sudden requirement to do a demonstration today and
had no time for prep... no time for reading up...
my mind was blank...
sucks sucks!!!
And who is he is say that I will be unemployed?...
Who is he?... just a professor in engineering and he can tell me that?
just coz he is assessing me I'll just give him face and keep my mouth shut and not retaliate...
not kill his pride the way I'd do to anybody on the streets...
sickening...madness
such horrid person...
who is he to dig into so much about what I'm going to do?
FOR YOUR INFO MISTER...IF YOU DIDN'T KNOW...
I'M ALREADY IN THE BIZ... I'M ALREADY ON THE GO...
I KNOW MY PRODUCT BETTER THAN ANY SHIT PROFESSORS CAN TALK ABOUT UNLESS THEY INVENTED THE DAMN THING!
Do this here....do this in the campus....but don't let me find you at my face one day asking me for quotations...
I'll make sure, you'll see many digits slapped at your face and you don't have a freaking choice on that...
unless you travel off shores far far away to get it...by then the costs all add up...
So much for saying you're trying to be fair..? c'mon....the other moderators were simply good and kind....you didn't know
you hit the billboards for being the asshold professor in the power division that all students hate to be under...
utterly no compassion when it comes to the system of education...comparing your intelligence with students...
why? is that because you have nobody else to compare yourself to?...
sucker...
if you find the things we do really complex...then you're just a piece of shit who got your many years of experience in the education into the waste....matching 10yrs of power experience to a student is totally a thing to look down upon....
Open your eyes....the people working around you feel the same way!!! just you....!
Friday, April 06, 2007
Where are you now
And who's by your side
Can't hide for a lifetime
Uncover your eyes
Wake up, in the morning
Share the sunlight shining down on us
You and me
Are these sad days always lost on us
Where am I now
and who's on my side
I'd wait for a lifetime
For you to come back
Wake up, in the evening
Share the moonlight shining down on us
You and me
Are these sad days always lost on us
Can anyone play me another sad song
Cause sad songs remind me of all that we've lost
Can anyone play me another sad song
Cause sad songs remind me of all that we've lost
Wake up, in the morning
Share the sunlight shining down on us
You and me
You and me
And who's by your side
Can't hide for a lifetime
Uncover your eyes
Wake up, in the morning
Share the sunlight shining down on us
You and me
Are these sad days always lost on us
Where am I now
and who's on my side
I'd wait for a lifetime
For you to come back
Wake up, in the evening
Share the moonlight shining down on us
You and me
Are these sad days always lost on us
Can anyone play me another sad song
Cause sad songs remind me of all that we've lost
Can anyone play me another sad song
Cause sad songs remind me of all that we've lost
Wake up, in the morning
Share the sunlight shining down on us
You and me
You and me
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Monday, April 02, 2007
Silence across...
the emptiness.
Feelings of hollow
deep under the flesh...
the zest...oh yes the zest...
it's somewhere...
under the pillow.
I found a night...
me dreaming.
So real...so very real...
where you from?...
will you visit me again?
...perhaps perhaps...
'til I find... someone like you...
I now have some clear vision...
the emptiness.
Feelings of hollow
deep under the flesh...
the zest...oh yes the zest...
it's somewhere...
under the pillow.
I found a night...
me dreaming.
So real...so very real...
where you from?...
will you visit me again?
...perhaps perhaps...
'til I find... someone like you...
I now have some clear vision...
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Saturday, March 31, 2007
gained 5kg in 2 weeks!
Lost 3 in a day....
with 2hrs of rock climbing (bouldering), 26 laps of swimming, 8km run,
wieghts circuit training and a big big jub of water for the day....
lol....and now my body is just burning...from the heat produced from all the day's workout...
isolation in progress... studies studies....it's the final burst...
But I'm real tired...
like swimming in a swimming pool of mud...
like running with a ball weight chained behind...
like cycling with a parachute attached...
since the recovery...
seems like coffee doesn't work much...
and redbull doesn't give me wings...
HELP!!!
Lost 3 in a day....
with 2hrs of rock climbing (bouldering), 26 laps of swimming, 8km run,
wieghts circuit training and a big big jub of water for the day....
lol....and now my body is just burning...from the heat produced from all the day's workout...
isolation in progress... studies studies....it's the final burst...
But I'm real tired...
like swimming in a swimming pool of mud...
like running with a ball weight chained behind...
like cycling with a parachute attached...
since the recovery...
seems like coffee doesn't work much...
and redbull doesn't give me wings...
HELP!!!
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Long hours of briefings
long but enriching moments of dealing with people...
exercising the soft skills once more.
All of a sudden I found myself with a title...
An Asst.Manager of Industrial Products Division...
Good enough to stand in the crowd of Singapore's official launch
Fuel Cell Community.
The Goal of Clean Energy.
The whole thing sounds real interesting...
the future of big cash flow...
My future in the business...
but it's yet a small portion of what I'm gona be dealing with...
So little time...so much to think... so much to do...
long but enriching moments of dealing with people...
exercising the soft skills once more.
All of a sudden I found myself with a title...
An Asst.Manager of Industrial Products Division...
Good enough to stand in the crowd of Singapore's official launch
Fuel Cell Community.
The Goal of Clean Energy.
The whole thing sounds real interesting...
the future of big cash flow...
My future in the business...
but it's yet a small portion of what I'm gona be dealing with...
So little time...so much to think... so much to do...
Sunday, March 25, 2007
"Her ghost hides
In my mind
In the night
In a way she’s haunting me
I’m wanting her still
Through rose colored skies
Or blue, blue moonlight
There’s miracles on high
She’s walking by
When I look at you I’ve got a 2nd chance
Really need to have you now
One by one they fall it always breaks me down
The quiet
Cuts me thru
The candle burnt
The knife has turned
The pain withers
Alive I know deep inside
When I look at you I’ve got a second chance
Really need to take it now
One by one they fall it always breaks me down
Her ghost hides
In my eyes
In the night
In a way she’s haunting me
I’m wanting her still
Through rose colored skies
Or blue, blue moonlight
There’s miracles on high
She’s walking by"
In my mind
In the night
In a way she’s haunting me
I’m wanting her still
Through rose colored skies
Or blue, blue moonlight
There’s miracles on high
She’s walking by
When I look at you I’ve got a 2nd chance
Really need to have you now
One by one they fall it always breaks me down
The quiet
Cuts me thru
The candle burnt
The knife has turned
The pain withers
Alive I know deep inside
When I look at you I’ve got a second chance
Really need to take it now
One by one they fall it always breaks me down
Her ghost hides
In my eyes
In the night
In a way she’s haunting me
I’m wanting her still
Through rose colored skies
Or blue, blue moonlight
There’s miracles on high
She’s walking by"
Maybe it's...
today I just got hit by the worst wave of migraine I've every gotten!!!
ARGH!!!! totally feels like I should just pry open the skull of mine!
Maybe it's the amount of knocks I got on the thursday...
Maybe it's the total amount of combat collisions...
Maybe it's the work stress that is building up...
Maybe it's the end of it all...
Oh well... Maybe it's just pure horrible migraine...
The weird outcome of my check up...
after multiple knee jabs, my ribs which I felt the crack from...
showed no signs of internal injuries...
no signs of hair line facture...
while I gave a dislocation of jaw...hanging with a jaw lock...
and a fractured collar bone...
Something is wrong somewhere...
Maybe it's the madness all contained in the ring...
Maybe the whole survival mentality locked on once a jab at my face just forcefully punched in...
Maybe it's the rush of adrenaline altogether and heightened the extra strength...
Maybe it's just some fire deep inside that isn't extinguished...
Maybe it's just pure defence for myself when confronted by highly offensive opponent...
Oh well... Maybe it's just good training and endurance put to good use...
Whatever it is... pressure heating and rising...
I can feel it... temper not to be trifled with...
Eyes are in flames...
yet the tiresome body wishes for rest
But the mind is a running squirrel cage...
with a stupid energizer rodent...
ARGH!!!! totally feels like I should just pry open the skull of mine!
Maybe it's the amount of knocks I got on the thursday...
Maybe it's the total amount of combat collisions...
Maybe it's the work stress that is building up...
Maybe it's the end of it all...
Oh well... Maybe it's just pure horrible migraine...
The weird outcome of my check up...
after multiple knee jabs, my ribs which I felt the crack from...
showed no signs of internal injuries...
no signs of hair line facture...
while I gave a dislocation of jaw...hanging with a jaw lock...
and a fractured collar bone...
Something is wrong somewhere...
Maybe it's the madness all contained in the ring...
Maybe the whole survival mentality locked on once a jab at my face just forcefully punched in...
Maybe it's the rush of adrenaline altogether and heightened the extra strength...
Maybe it's just some fire deep inside that isn't extinguished...
Maybe it's just pure defence for myself when confronted by highly offensive opponent...
Oh well... Maybe it's just good training and endurance put to good use...
Whatever it is... pressure heating and rising...
I can feel it... temper not to be trifled with...
Eyes are in flames...
yet the tiresome body wishes for rest
But the mind is a running squirrel cage...
with a stupid energizer rodent...
Friday, March 23, 2007
Sometimes I wonder why
The fields of love seems like a game
where I a walking piece
at a lost on what I am to find
how is it that I always end up with a sigh
while up there the one most high
just playfully throw the die for the daily moments to take place...
some steps I find one awaiting
some steps I find I'm awaiting
yet some I see myself eager to take the very next
while I see the the person on the next moving off soon...
out of my reach...
the hurting madness of the whole cycle...
I should just stick a blade into myself and end the game
and call it quits...
but yet damn it...
it isn't me...
The fields of love seems like a game
where I a walking piece
at a lost on what I am to find
how is it that I always end up with a sigh
while up there the one most high
just playfully throw the die for the daily moments to take place...
some steps I find one awaiting
some steps I find I'm awaiting
yet some I see myself eager to take the very next
while I see the the person on the next moving off soon...
out of my reach...
the hurting madness of the whole cycle...
I should just stick a blade into myself and end the game
and call it quits...
but yet damn it...
it isn't me...
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
If I had castles built on high...

"If I had castles built on high
I'd find a million ways
to write your name against the sky
Just to let you know
you've caught my eye...
And if I had more than wealth could buy,
I'd sell it all and start again
Just for a chance with you...
I'd build my world around you,
Just to show you...
How you take my breath away..."
Tuesday, March 20, 2007

with a short hr after the over drive installation on a fairly new WRX
of 2yrs old...
the joy ride turned to a drag race.
Smashin' gas with so much torque...
just when I was done with the machine and system studies on mechanical torque
theories and now I'm pushin' that over the limits!...OMG...
GRrrrrrrrrrr.......running the fierce engines all ready to blow...
A good distance from Emergency runway to where reservoir was located,
the stench of burnt rubber just filled the air together with the power combustion of Fuel...
rocketing the WRX forward at the fastest speed I could handle...
snapping a shot at a corner with a good 10mega pixel SLR...I must say she is damn good...
of coz...with abit of touching up.
Monday, March 19, 2007
"This time...
all I want is you
there is no one else
who can take your place...
This time...
You burn me with your eyes
in my heart I look past all
my hurt pain and lies
you take it all away...
I've seen you in days and all
it was never enough
and it keeps leaving me needing you...
You swept me
and took my breathe away..."
all I want is you
there is no one else
who can take your place...
This time...
You burn me with your eyes
in my heart I look past all
my hurt pain and lies
you take it all away...
I've seen you in days and all
it was never enough
and it keeps leaving me needing you...
You swept me
and took my breathe away..."
Sunday, March 18, 2007
For the moments...
suddenly, I yearned the touch...
I missed the time of warmth...
not with any is specific...
just the feeling...
and I now fear the effect on my reaction to those around...
treading on boats could be disastrous
even if it was just mere seconds...
There are many things up on my mind...
all at a go...
Can't exactly tell what and which to listen to...
plain "Rojak"
suddenly, I yearned the touch...
I missed the time of warmth...
not with any is specific...
just the feeling...
and I now fear the effect on my reaction to those around...
treading on boats could be disastrous
even if it was just mere seconds...
There are many things up on my mind...
all at a go...
Can't exactly tell what and which to listen to...
plain "Rojak"
The world is small...
Connections I find from one to another...
one by one...
all in just a few days...
People I thought I lost...
found...
people that could spark up other memories...
fires...
I'm now officially a rep of Rotina Internation Pte Ltd...
in the new up and coming
Fuel Cell techno start up kinda of biz in Singapore by Temesak Group...
And yet I'm still studying and slogging as a student...
imagine that...
Sigh....the thought of school
Connections I find from one to another...
one by one...
all in just a few days...
People I thought I lost...
found...
people that could spark up other memories...
fires...
I'm now officially a rep of Rotina Internation Pte Ltd...
in the new up and coming
Fuel Cell techno start up kinda of biz in Singapore by Temesak Group...
And yet I'm still studying and slogging as a student...
imagine that...
Sigh....the thought of school
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Funny how easy it seems to be able to make issues blow
by just sparking a fire to what they sow...
just like frying up a disk....
sprinkle the oil
a dash of spices
and all you do next is just pure stirring...
and see what happens...
it starts to boil....bubble up...and things from the inside just unfold...
by just sparking a fire to what they sow...
just like frying up a disk....
sprinkle the oil
a dash of spices
and all you do next is just pure stirring...
and see what happens...
it starts to boil....bubble up...and things from the inside just unfold...
Monday, March 12, 2007
It's burning....stress stress!!! Pressure...all in the outside world!...what the future brings!
Suddenly in this phase of my life...
I feel great pressure...
Imagine having rejected a number of high paying jobs
for the reason of future prospects...
I've chanced myself upon another one that will probably bring me to greater heights...
but at a probably also ridiculous rate....
with madness burning of brain juice...
Shunt away $5k paying kinda job for your information....
and ended up with this...
This kinda bright future...
but could probably get me into working ....
very much like a workaholic...
Anyway...
Saturday afternoon,
met up with my future boss to talk about issues after my graduations...
I came to know of my final destination in this company....
which was very much to become a director in one of the divisions he is going to set in
time to come....which is probably in a couple of months...especially after I'm set and going.
The new office would be ready in june and I'm already to sit in to talk about how I'd like my office to be like...
How my department will be like...it's my planning already.
And more to come...
Was asked... what do I see myself as in 3yrs time?....or...correction...at the age of 30?
Hmmm....I said...I ain't too sure, but I'm sure I'd love to settle down...and attain some personal settlements....
get a house, a car...(damn I'm thinking of RX8... only young once for a selfish car....wahahaha)
with everything almost fully paid for and less loans to deal with.
And the next would be having a strong and stable job...I'll last me a long way....hmm well seems to me...
this could very well be it. Coz...in time, once taken over a division and being a senior board of managers...
I'm actually running the division like my own biz and just giving him a royalty of the profits while he
does other stuff....in his life....and cash...
having said all that...
there are things I've to be well equiped in....
and I was told that probably the norm of a person would need to take at least a yr to get in tuned with the facts and to
learn all the specifications in hand and in manuals...
but he is gona give me just 6mths...
and in just a split...he says, he's got the confidence I can do it in 3months....OMG!
keep halfing the amount, I'd see myself having to be good to go by today!
and once I'm ready I'll be like the boss on the technical specifications and all enquiries dealing with
Motors, pumps, blowers... the expert of the company....all ready to make the money roll and
be in marketing and design of industrial solutions to the region...and for some areas...to the world.
It's like rightfully taking over almost quarter of the enterprise...and with a share holding of it.
A small guy like me suddenly hit off like that?...
OK ok....stressed...
I didn't know what to think when comparying my past experiences in work and abilities and expertise to what I'm
gona be hitting off with....wow...totally off the charts...totally off course....
Why do I like to SM myself?....madness....
And so...Boss wanted to give me a huge start off...considering Google and yahoo offers...not forgetting credit suisse too
But looking at the learning phase I'd wanna give myself and not to be overly loaded with the pay I'm getitng and
the things I've to hold on to....
I said...I guess I'd better get some starting norm for probation first... that way...people won't be talking...or even thinking
I'm heading into something impossible...
Ok now...having said that...I got myself a reasonable 2.85 a month...and also, company provides me a car at the luxury for my own use...
and besides that...with this probation...every 4months I'm getting a review for increment...and the ups and not small...
probably a huge fold...
and with that...
He just smiled at me saying...head off well with the first 6months...fire off in a year...and whatever I'd think of having for my goals at the age of 30...
I' probably already have gotten it...no sweat!
Damn...should I even believe myself?...
luck?...or just a slap on my face to wake up?....
Kenneth Chan....future Boss...
creating his own regional empire with the initial aid of an experienced and well rounded business man...
who climbed out of 2 bankruptcies and now a millionaire...owning 3 mercedes 1 BMW 1 skoda 3 vans and an upcoming
lamborgini/ferrari/maserati... He calls himself a car collector...just buys them....maintains them and not drive...just park them in his big house of swarovski lightings and 3 BMW sound systems and 4 ultra flat at least 40inch LCD screens...
well guarded by 2 huskies and 2 beagals...
Does that sound good enough for confidence in such a boss?....
Damn I like to think so!....
I feel great pressure...
Imagine having rejected a number of high paying jobs
for the reason of future prospects...
I've chanced myself upon another one that will probably bring me to greater heights...
but at a probably also ridiculous rate....
with madness burning of brain juice...
Shunt away $5k paying kinda job for your information....
and ended up with this...
This kinda bright future...
but could probably get me into working ....
very much like a workaholic...
Anyway...
Saturday afternoon,
met up with my future boss to talk about issues after my graduations...
I came to know of my final destination in this company....
which was very much to become a director in one of the divisions he is going to set in
time to come....which is probably in a couple of months...especially after I'm set and going.
The new office would be ready in june and I'm already to sit in to talk about how I'd like my office to be like...
How my department will be like...it's my planning already.
And more to come...
Was asked... what do I see myself as in 3yrs time?....or...correction...at the age of 30?
Hmmm....I said...I ain't too sure, but I'm sure I'd love to settle down...and attain some personal settlements....
get a house, a car...(damn I'm thinking of RX8... only young once for a selfish car....wahahaha)
with everything almost fully paid for and less loans to deal with.
And the next would be having a strong and stable job...I'll last me a long way....hmm well seems to me...
this could very well be it. Coz...in time, once taken over a division and being a senior board of managers...
I'm actually running the division like my own biz and just giving him a royalty of the profits while he
does other stuff....in his life....and cash...
having said all that...
there are things I've to be well equiped in....
and I was told that probably the norm of a person would need to take at least a yr to get in tuned with the facts and to
learn all the specifications in hand and in manuals...
but he is gona give me just 6mths...
and in just a split...he says, he's got the confidence I can do it in 3months....OMG!
keep halfing the amount, I'd see myself having to be good to go by today!
and once I'm ready I'll be like the boss on the technical specifications and all enquiries dealing with
Motors, pumps, blowers... the expert of the company....all ready to make the money roll and
be in marketing and design of industrial solutions to the region...and for some areas...to the world.
It's like rightfully taking over almost quarter of the enterprise...and with a share holding of it.
A small guy like me suddenly hit off like that?...
OK ok....stressed...
I didn't know what to think when comparying my past experiences in work and abilities and expertise to what I'm
gona be hitting off with....wow...totally off the charts...totally off course....
Why do I like to SM myself?....madness....
And so...Boss wanted to give me a huge start off...considering Google and yahoo offers...not forgetting credit suisse too
But looking at the learning phase I'd wanna give myself and not to be overly loaded with the pay I'm getitng and
the things I've to hold on to....
I said...I guess I'd better get some starting norm for probation first... that way...people won't be talking...or even thinking
I'm heading into something impossible...
Ok now...having said that...I got myself a reasonable 2.85 a month...and also, company provides me a car at the luxury for my own use...
and besides that...with this probation...every 4months I'm getting a review for increment...and the ups and not small...
probably a huge fold...
and with that...
He just smiled at me saying...head off well with the first 6months...fire off in a year...and whatever I'd think of having for my goals at the age of 30...
I' probably already have gotten it...no sweat!
Damn...should I even believe myself?...
luck?...or just a slap on my face to wake up?....
Kenneth Chan....future Boss...
creating his own regional empire with the initial aid of an experienced and well rounded business man...
who climbed out of 2 bankruptcies and now a millionaire...owning 3 mercedes 1 BMW 1 skoda 3 vans and an upcoming
lamborgini/ferrari/maserati... He calls himself a car collector...just buys them....maintains them and not drive...just park them in his big house of swarovski lightings and 3 BMW sound systems and 4 ultra flat at least 40inch LCD screens...
well guarded by 2 huskies and 2 beagals...
Does that sound good enough for confidence in such a boss?....
Damn I like to think so!....

Weekends....weeekends....
was cool having another 2 new friends joining in the
rocking of walls...at yishun safra...
glad they enjoyed it too...
and I guess I conquered anything that was for horizontal bouldering in the
rock gym....now it's gona be time for hitting off for new routes...
But somehow...the fatigue of my body is setting in....too long no sleep....it's going to kill me soon...
and today my migraines are back with fury....
argh!....
But still Dinner at Ikoi....damn shiok! all the Jap food...all the protein load for sashimi and stuff...
WoooHooo!!!!
My lack of sleep is getting to me....argh....bad bad....
this is really bad...
sigh....
Thursday, March 08, 2007
memories suddenly waved back...
I dreamt of the moment...
"I was made to love you" streaming at the background...
heated up body I was...
weak and sick...
But there dried ice I had flowing out...
like rushing bora waves...
filling up the room and sipping out of the door under...
A melted heart made of ice I regret disappeared
and made a puddle of cold water...
Wata heck....I'm just a melted puddle of cold water anyway...
"I was made to love you" streaming at the background...
heated up body I was...
weak and sick...
But there dried ice I had flowing out...
like rushing bora waves...
filling up the room and sipping out of the door under...
A melted heart made of ice I regret disappeared
and made a puddle of cold water...
Wata heck....I'm just a melted puddle of cold water anyway...
Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Don't need a lot of things
Can get by with nothing...
And of all the blessings life can bring
I've always needed something,
But I've got all I want.
When it comes to loving...
Oh you're like my only reason...
My truth I see.
Like water
Like breath
Like rain
you're needed...
like mercy from heaven's gate above...
Freedom is felt in your arms
and it can carry me through
each and everyday...
The hope that moves me
and courage, again and again...
The very spark that can rescue me
from the raging cold winds
and the thunderous days...
it's amazing
that's how you are...
but you didn't know...
you couldn't see...
Oh where do I begin I look for a way
to tell you and there's so much to say
just look at me and say you wanna know
for my hear is real and here to stay...
Countless moments I tried to find you
told myself and reminded me that it's all true
If you wonder about my love from end to start...
come see it...
just come over and see it...
through the window of my heart...
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Monday, March 05, 2007
Colour Everywhere
used to seeing black and white
never really in between
waiting for the love of my life
to come into my dreams
everything is shades of gray
never really blues or green
needed someone else to turn to
someone who could help me learn to see
all the beauty that was waiting for me
you, you put the blue back in the sky
you put the rainbow in my eyes
a silver lining in my prayers
and now there's colour everywhere
you put the red back in the rose
just when i needed it the most
you came along to show you care
and now there's colour everywhere
everywhere
my life is so predictale
never any mystery
but ever since you shined the light
all of that was history
now i have a hand to hold
and a reason to believe
there's someone in my worth living for
i was hanging around just wishing on a star
to put the happines back in my heart and...
you, you put the blue back in the sky
you put the rainbow in my eyes
a silver lining in my prayers
and now there's colour everywhere
you put the red back in the rose
just when i needed it the most
you came along to show you care
and now there's colour everywhere
oh yeah...
you care and now there's colour everywhere
left those hazy days behind me
never to return again
now they're just a fading memory
coz baby it's all so clear to see
the beauty that is waiting there for me
you, you put the blue back in the sky
you put the rainbow in my eyes
a silver lining in my prayers
and now there's colour everywhere
you put the red back in the rose
just when i needed it the most
you came along to show you care
and now there's colour everywhere
a silver lining in my prayers
and now there's colour everywhere
you came along to show you care
never really in between
waiting for the love of my life
to come into my dreams
everything is shades of gray
never really blues or green
needed someone else to turn to
someone who could help me learn to see
all the beauty that was waiting for me
you, you put the blue back in the sky
you put the rainbow in my eyes
a silver lining in my prayers
and now there's colour everywhere
you put the red back in the rose
just when i needed it the most
you came along to show you care
and now there's colour everywhere
everywhere
my life is so predictale
never any mystery
but ever since you shined the light
all of that was history
now i have a hand to hold
and a reason to believe
there's someone in my worth living for
i was hanging around just wishing on a star
to put the happines back in my heart and...
you, you put the blue back in the sky
you put the rainbow in my eyes
a silver lining in my prayers
and now there's colour everywhere
you put the red back in the rose
just when i needed it the most
you came along to show you care
and now there's colour everywhere
oh yeah...
you care and now there's colour everywhere
left those hazy days behind me
never to return again
now they're just a fading memory
coz baby it's all so clear to see
the beauty that is waiting there for me
you, you put the blue back in the sky
you put the rainbow in my eyes
a silver lining in my prayers
and now there's colour everywhere
you put the red back in the rose
just when i needed it the most
you came along to show you care
and now there's colour everywhere
a silver lining in my prayers
and now there's colour everywhere
you came along to show you care
Banging on the trance music...
like sometimes you'd just want all the energy out
totally transferred....
then comes the rock music mixed in
R&B with hip hop...
and soon leading to soul and acoustics...
Just days when you just throw your handphone...
be uncontactable...get out of the messenger life
and just blast!...
Don't have to bother who thinks what about you...
don't have to care how people look at you as...
Or anything of that matter...
views will be just views...
their emotions will be just their emotions...
feel pissed, feel anger... feel frustrated...
oh that's their problem...
but feel happy and stuff... oh you wanna share,
just bring it on if not... feel free to buzz of either way...
those self righteous people who takes all to judge...
to get pissed easily...you can carry on...
just carry on...
at the end of the day you find yourself being filled with the unhappiness...
not me...
you wanna crash and burn...fine by me... none of me biz...
This time....
this moment...it's just me...
that's the way it's gona be...
like sometimes you'd just want all the energy out
totally transferred....
then comes the rock music mixed in
R&B with hip hop...
and soon leading to soul and acoustics...
Just days when you just throw your handphone...
be uncontactable...get out of the messenger life
and just blast!...
Don't have to bother who thinks what about you...
don't have to care how people look at you as...
Or anything of that matter...
views will be just views...
their emotions will be just their emotions...
feel pissed, feel anger... feel frustrated...
oh that's their problem...
but feel happy and stuff... oh you wanna share,
just bring it on if not... feel free to buzz of either way...
those self righteous people who takes all to judge...
to get pissed easily...you can carry on...
just carry on...
at the end of the day you find yourself being filled with the unhappiness...
not me...
you wanna crash and burn...fine by me... none of me biz...
This time....
this moment...it's just me...
that's the way it's gona be...
Sunday, March 04, 2007



The weekends....
cool....good climbs...had fun...
with my 3 buds....
Getting them into the sport...
great workout....
exercise of determination...
and really something that really is calorie burning...
But this time round, most of the time trying to conquer over hangs...and those upside down routes...
Thinking if I should make it some weekly thing...
hahahaaa....Hmmmm....
Soon enough I hope the next step with them would be....
On natural rocks! Rock On!!!
wwahaahahaa....
Whatever,
however...
Don't give a shit much...
you can think all you want
curse all you want
the shit
go fall in the pit
I'm freakin' SICK OF IT
not even missin' it
damn it pissin' it
crappin' shit on it...
put your eyes away if you don't like it
I'm not gona fight it
Just let it be...
the way that I see
Gee Wee...I'm happy you see
Oh just let it be...
however...
Don't give a shit much...
you can think all you want
curse all you want
the shit
go fall in the pit
I'm freakin' SICK OF IT
not even missin' it
damn it pissin' it
crappin' shit on it...
put your eyes away if you don't like it
I'm not gona fight it
Just let it be...
the way that I see
Gee Wee...I'm happy you see
Oh just let it be...
Saturday, March 03, 2007
In time I stall and wonder
how some things come around
fear and troubles hit like rolling thunder
missing and yearning for
but yet on looking I'm losing more
Sometimes I ask myself
is being honest worthwhile?
is being true gona bring me a further mile?
Today I slept with thoughts
clouding in my head...
Sleep sleep...the body rests
but the mind stays in constant reflection...
how some things come around
fear and troubles hit like rolling thunder
missing and yearning for
but yet on looking I'm losing more
Sometimes I ask myself
is being honest worthwhile?
is being true gona bring me a further mile?
Today I slept with thoughts
clouding in my head...
Sleep sleep...the body rests
but the mind stays in constant reflection...
Friday, March 02, 2007
Thursday, March 01, 2007
~There's nothing i won't try
Just to make you mine
To get a little closer
Would be so divine
And everytime i see you
You make me come undone
I always watch you near me
In you i found the one
Oh why don't you smile my only star
Shine on baby
Smile my only star
With you by my side
baby it feels so right
And now that i'm close to you
I could stay all night
No matter where i go
No matter what i do
In the end your smile
Brings me back to you
You shine so true
I can't believe you're mine
And everything may change
But to me you'll always shine~
Just to make you mine
To get a little closer
Would be so divine
And everytime i see you
You make me come undone
I always watch you near me
In you i found the one
Oh why don't you smile my only star
Shine on baby
Smile my only star
With you by my side
baby it feels so right
And now that i'm close to you
I could stay all night
No matter where i go
No matter what i do
In the end your smile
Brings me back to you
You shine so true
I can't believe you're mine
And everything may change
But to me you'll always shine~


See what happens when you've got the darn weather keeping you indoors...
totally wet....and heavy to the max... cold...
with a very very badly beatened brain
filled with all the work all the strains and hassle...
A time when having proper meals outside becomes a problem...
it all becomes a question...
And so, you bring out whatever possible stock you have in store...
in the little cubic white cooler, and make fire like in 'cast away'...
After that it's all about burning and let the smoke rise to the senses of everybody...
that hey... we're sharin' some BBQ iin the midst of the this cold weather at the....
erhmm....I won't say comfort but simplicity of the staircase and the convenience of near vacinity of our rooms...
Way out of the norms from cooking the noodles, frying of canned food, stirring up pasta carbonara or basil and olive oil or even
whipping up some ham and mushroom cheese omelette... maybe topped with some nice pancakes and fruits like kiwi, grapes, banana and blue berries if it's int he morning...
But it's all do-able and the difference would be made with sharin' the time with some neighbours...
Strangely anyway, these days I've been very much heated on with chile wine especially Cabernet Sauvignon range of reds...
If needed to for beer, it would be the same Boddington and Kilkenny, some Oaky tasting draught all in a can...
My fridge is loaded!
anyway... it's good.
But once back to the rooms...life turns back to the norms and the work goes on...
the brain wreckage continues...
It's already half way through the heavy so called "recess week" of the term...
and the shit will start flowing through once 5th of March sets in...
Way to go....just way to go...
There's only one way actually...
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Was trying to practice vector conversion from photo...
after a long night of thinking and penning down stuff for my FYP report...
I got so mentally drained that I started doing graphics....hahahaa
excuses!....
but anyway....couldn't think for the report already so...might as well do something constructive right?....hahaa
here it is!...
just randomly picked the first picture my cursor was on and worked on it....
Not that good at it yet....YET....
will work more on it in future....hmmmmm.....
got a long way for that!
after a long night of thinking and penning down stuff for my FYP report...
I got so mentally drained that I started doing graphics....hahahaa
excuses!....
but anyway....couldn't think for the report already so...might as well do something constructive right?....hahaa
here it is!...
just randomly picked the first picture my cursor was on and worked on it....
Not that good at it yet....YET....
will work more on it in future....hmmmmm.....
got a long way for that!
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Work work work....simply flowing in...
so much work
so much stress
so many deadlines...
all unending...
Calls after calls of biz too...
not sure for some if I should even take them...
not sure for some if I'm up to it...
coz sometimes, people tend to be over ambitious...
They all want the world for a cheap price...
while I set a cost by the effort and time invested in the work...
sometimes when it comes to dealing with friends....
it becomes harder...
so much harder...
you want to give them the best price, yet...
based on the time and workdone for it... it becomes totally crazy...
totally madness to even take it in the first place.
I'm a free lancer...
a self taught graphics designer and flash animator...
the abilities...are all up to my expectations...
sometimes...there are things which are overwhelming...
good for the pocket...but might not be good for the brain...
coz my mind has already been mistreated...
excuse me now... while I just try my best,
to just give myself a rest...
before my whole starts to degrade exponentially...
so much work
so much stress
so many deadlines...
all unending...
Calls after calls of biz too...
not sure for some if I should even take them...
not sure for some if I'm up to it...
coz sometimes, people tend to be over ambitious...
They all want the world for a cheap price...
while I set a cost by the effort and time invested in the work...
sometimes when it comes to dealing with friends....
it becomes harder...
so much harder...
you want to give them the best price, yet...
based on the time and workdone for it... it becomes totally crazy...
totally madness to even take it in the first place.
I'm a free lancer...
a self taught graphics designer and flash animator...
the abilities...are all up to my expectations...
sometimes...there are things which are overwhelming...
good for the pocket...but might not be good for the brain...
coz my mind has already been mistreated...
excuse me now... while I just try my best,
to just give myself a rest...
before my whole starts to degrade exponentially...
still in wonder....
still in thought...
of the moment I saw it appear in my room...
And courage I sought...
Communication i bridge.
The split of freakiness
sipped in...there my shivers in seconds.
Reality sat in and everything was just alright.
But unhideaous she was...
pretty was the less than opaque visual
yet weary I was...
but less afraid i became...
still in thought...
of the moment I saw it appear in my room...
And courage I sought...
Communication i bridge.
The split of freakiness
sipped in...there my shivers in seconds.
Reality sat in and everything was just alright.
But unhideaous she was...
pretty was the less than opaque visual
yet weary I was...
but less afraid i became...
Monday, February 26, 2007
Injured...
Pain...wrapped up...
aches and swells...
blood and pus...
the mind all in a swirl...
So in a swirl...
migrains...
Back to haunt...
a combinational package
raging to kills me...
slowly....inside.
What is it?... Can't really tell...
One day I might just go...
Go away...to a land afar...
disappear into nothingness....
and swift off with the sound of the wind...
Pain...wrapped up...
aches and swells...
blood and pus...
the mind all in a swirl...
So in a swirl...
migrains...
Back to haunt...
a combinational package
raging to kills me...
slowly....inside.
What is it?... Can't really tell...
One day I might just go...
Go away...to a land afar...
disappear into nothingness....
and swift off with the sound of the wind...
My return...
back to home...
the comfort of everything else around me.
Tired from all the works.
Yet today was enriching.
Talking to kids about creativity and innovation
can be just so funny...
had to try hard to keep all the laughter.
Kids say the darnest things...really...
And it was odd having to come to terms with them calling me Mr Chan...
Suddenly felt my age....hahahaaa....
And walking in the school I saw a darn hot teacher...couldn't imagine my eyes...
But she had the looks of those pornstar wannabes...
Argh...got the very very bitchy look...
This kinda....think better not get too close...trouble is just around her.
back to home...
the comfort of everything else around me.
Tired from all the works.
Yet today was enriching.
Talking to kids about creativity and innovation
can be just so funny...
had to try hard to keep all the laughter.
Kids say the darnest things...really...
And it was odd having to come to terms with them calling me Mr Chan...
Suddenly felt my age....hahahaaa....
And walking in the school I saw a darn hot teacher...couldn't imagine my eyes...
But she had the looks of those pornstar wannabes...
Argh...got the very very bitchy look...
This kinda....think better not get too close...trouble is just around her.
Sunday, February 25, 2007
~A world challenged
limits we are bound
take a step beyond
breathe the difference
that the countless
unending we find
an arena uncontrolled
benefits we reap
the quickness of reaction
brings the impact escalation
that life ain't that simple afterall.
Take a walk down the road
today's steps are tomorrow's old
what can't you see is what you want to clear
what you can see you already know
but yet not hearing or fear
The moment's safety is yet the second's danger
where there is vastness
there is multitude or variations
thus comes the infinity of results.
We never know what's tomorrow like
yet tomorrow will come
sit and hope with actions unacted
we stand at a point where we become dails
things changes around us
but position is a ritual til eternal dust...~
limits we are bound
take a step beyond
breathe the difference
that the countless
unending we find
an arena uncontrolled
benefits we reap
the quickness of reaction
brings the impact escalation
that life ain't that simple afterall.
Take a walk down the road
today's steps are tomorrow's old
what can't you see is what you want to clear
what you can see you already know
but yet not hearing or fear
The moment's safety is yet the second's danger
where there is vastness
there is multitude or variations
thus comes the infinity of results.
We never know what's tomorrow like
yet tomorrow will come
sit and hope with actions unacted
we stand at a point where we become dails
things changes around us
but position is a ritual til eternal dust...~
Saturday, February 24, 2007


Imagine yourself in a spanish arena
not in the midst of concrete again...
with me, you always get near to waters...
There you see the beauty of every simple thing.
How backward things may look
but yet to many it could just be paradise.
all at the back of where you reside for the few days...
And then next to mexico...a walk amongst ruins
yet so beautiful....
so eye catching...seated at Quintana Roo
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