Almost crossing halfway through the next morning...
I'm up awake, partially studying and partially in thought of the unhappiness of my love.
maybe we should just be spontaneous... bringing more excitement to the relationship that I want...
like either one of us just have some idea on what we feel like doing that very moment....just kick off and go do it.
I guess I can deal with that...

But I think I'd be feeling the difficulty when it comes to high costing material pampering... compared to anyone out there....
I guess for that I'm at a losing end...
But baby... I do hope you'll accept this part of me...


*so tired but I can't sleep*

Yet things don't get any easier... the road that I hope to smoothen out... I wanna work.

How cool a relationship is
it's very much how 2 work around each other.
The acceptancy, contentment issues...

The truth is that the relationship is important to me such that
I'd bring it up to another level...
Thus the feeling of which makes one feel like married, but not yet.
I know youth is yet another issue.
It seems like what I was looking for then
is very much what I'm looking for now.
A sense of stability, a peace of mind and a love I can comfortably say will last forever.
Yet I'm not saying that others should head on the very same footsteps I've been taking.
It's just me... a guy of a different perspective.

What I have I lay down for you...
My abilities, my strengths, my weakness, my limits, my consciousness, my love, my care, my time, my body, my mind...
What you see is what you get... all put neatly in order for you to see... for the person I am...

All at your disposal and decision...

Sometimes I feel that what I feel and what I decide to do or can do or will do is going to be inmaterial...
coz ultimately it's what you see them as that makes the difference.

I may love and want to hold on to...and fight for...
but if by keeping I have you unhappy... living by my decisions...
the course of actions then would be better to have it as yours to decide upon.

Baby...
I believe we did have our happy times....wonderful moments that makes the feeling of worth at the end of everything else...
but it's essentially all for you to give weightage to and all up to you.

Darling...
your card... A special message...
when given to me...fluttered my heart so much that each time I read it everyday I'd tear and smile to myself...
it brought meaning to everything in me...
I believe it too means very much to you too....