Was trying to practice vector conversion from photo...
after a long night of thinking and penning down stuff for my FYP report...
I got so mentally drained that I started doing graphics....hahahaa

excuses!....
but anyway....couldn't think for the report already so...might as well do something constructive right?....hahaa

here it is!...
just randomly picked the first picture my cursor was on and worked on it....

Not that good at it yet....YET....
will work more on it in future....hmmmmm.....

got a long way for that!

Work work work....simply flowing in...
so much work
so much stress
so many deadlines...
all unending...
Calls after calls of biz too...
not sure for some if I should even take them...
not sure for some if I'm up to it...
coz sometimes, people tend to be over ambitious...
They all want the world for a cheap price...
while I set a cost by the effort and time invested in the work...
sometimes when it comes to dealing with friends....
it becomes harder...
so much harder...
you want to give them the best price, yet...
based on the time and workdone for it... it becomes totally crazy...
totally madness to even take it in the first place.
I'm a free lancer...
a self taught graphics designer and flash animator...
the abilities...are all up to my expectations...
sometimes...there are things which are overwhelming...
good for the pocket...but might not be good for the brain...
coz my mind has already been mistreated...
excuse me now... while I just try my best,
to just give myself a rest...
before my whole starts to degrade exponentially...

still in wonder....
still in thought...
of the moment I saw it appear in my room...
And courage I sought...
Communication i bridge.
The split of freakiness
sipped in...there my shivers in seconds.
Reality sat in and everything was just alright.
But unhideaous she was...
pretty was the less than opaque visual
yet weary I was...
but less afraid i became...

Injured...
Pain...wrapped up...
aches and swells...
blood and pus...
the mind all in a swirl...
So in a swirl...
migrains...
Back to haunt...
a combinational package
raging to kills me...
slowly....inside.
What is it?... Can't really tell...
One day I might just go...
Go away...to a land afar...
disappear into nothingness....
and swift off with the sound of the wind...

My return...
back to home...
the comfort of everything else around me.
Tired from all the works.
Yet today was enriching.
Talking to kids about creativity and innovation
can be just so funny...
had to try hard to keep all the laughter.
Kids say the darnest things...really...
And it was odd having to come to terms with them calling me Mr Chan...
Suddenly felt my age....hahahaaa....
And walking in the school I saw a darn hot teacher...couldn't imagine my eyes...
But she had the looks of those pornstar wannabes...
Argh...got the very very bitchy look...
This kinda....think better not get too close...trouble is just around her.

Now seated in view of the wonderful sunset...
Mexico that is...
mind relieving...
soothing the soul...
And how walking through the alley in the city
you suddenly find something so close to home...
so familiar...
the 7-11....wahahahaaa....

The wonderful structures
sculptured patterns of barcelona,
the night view by the waters
and the beautiful docking area
which I used to call my 2nd home...

Ok...sorry for the delay for the BBQ compilation pics...
have been busy and stuff...
lack of ideas on how the background should be....but now...
it's done boyz and girlz...
but these are the toned down ones... can't load too big files on the net...
Hope you like these.
Cheers!

My project of a computer magazine cover is done...
ready for handing in!...
all put into an actual magazine product... here's how it's supposed to look like
for the front and the back...

Emptiness...
A void left inside...
Of a day so normal
there's nothing much inside.
Vexed...

~A world challenged
limits we are bound
take a step beyond
breathe the difference
that the countless
unending we find
an arena uncontrolled
benefits we reap
the quickness of reaction
brings the impact escalation
that life ain't that simple afterall.
Take a walk down the road
today's steps are tomorrow's old
what can't you see is what you want to clear
what you can see you already know
but yet not hearing or fear
The moment's safety is yet the second's danger
where there is vastness
there is multitude or variations
thus comes the infinity of results.
We never know what's tomorrow like
yet tomorrow will come
sit and hope with actions unacted
we stand at a point where we become dails
things changes around us
but position is a ritual til eternal dust...~

well of coz...not forgetting
this little one....swimming in the open
that caught my sight as a little dot from afar
and then....as it drew nearer...
the cute little thing.

Imagine yourself in a spanish arena
not in the midst of concrete again...
with me, you always get near to waters...
There you see the beauty of every simple thing.
How backward things may look
but yet to many it could just be paradise.
all at the back of where you reside for the few days...
And then next to mexico...a walk amongst ruins
yet so beautiful....
so eye catching...seated at Quintana Roo

And for the once I face a decline
for such issues in my life...
That somehow I see no energy in me to pursue further.
Drained...
Today I smile and the next moment faint
A face of courage and endurance of pain
physical energy but mental zonked
...
Whatever...
Just ...
Drained...

Staring blankly
with strums of slow spanish romance
racing runs after runs
but reality bites
and reality scars
feelings of yesterday just watered
and what doors were left
turned stone cold...
shivers returns with the emptiness
what realisation I held inside
forced to fade into nothingness
yet it can't be instant
it's process can't be quicken
oh Lord how I wished things were otherwise
but as it's not...
I'm still around for
and be standing by
But now...I'm here...
just right here...
for you...

lacerated and down I am

~|Cold cool air
heal my wounds
and every deep cuts'n tear

Heal scrapes of mine
my bruises
and harness focus of my mind

Heal me and make me whole
heal my heart
and heal my soul

Heal me from the grind I tried
heal my body
and heal my pride that's left of me...|~

~A return of a gift
brings pain to the heart...
What does that mean?
or is it that ne'er can it start?
I'd rather it's being kept...
away from me
even if it's negative you see.
At least spare me...
please...
To see things given returned to me
is like taking what I've offered
and slapping me with it.
The pain...
Oh damn I'm in pain...
like a wall just placed before me
with no knowing why...
I'm returning to black hole all with a sigh~

I came upon a pic I once edited...
the place I worked for a short while...very nice...
relaxed...
Well as the Bartender...
A totally spanish Bar setting serving Tapas...
Well actually Tapas are small quantities of food...
aka. appetizers in Spanish cuisine.
It's something that is given to accompany a drink before
a main meal...well that's in Spain...not in Singapore.
Here, you just gotta pay to sit in there with a drink.

In the past, this place was called 'The Tapas' with
an octopus in the logo...now it's called
'La Viva'

"I've nothing, but an empty space...
To be filled and warmth will sip in
And love flows in the blood"

I close my eyes...
wondering what I could see beyond the physical world...
Like I've been able to see those things they say aren't human
I only heard voices surrounding me...
filling my ears through and through...
I only saw myself taking on challenges after challenges...
one after another...
had a whole lot of comments rushing in today...
Went to a house where there was a fortune teller from thailand...
Just there to look at the group of people at cost already dealt with...
And he saw me as he person who goes from challenges after challenges...
With people, against people, against myself...
Very much like I had in mind earlier...
darn shocking...
And that there will be a point soon where I will hit growing point in career
ain't just that...
Someone whom I'd stay with will soon come my way...
lol...damn....this is madness....
Think about it....
Don't know if it's actually true....hahaaa

~|I ought to be workin' but I can't concentrate
I ought to be sleeping but I stayed up real late
When I ought to be doing the things I should do...
I think about you....
I ought to be writing, but I can't find a song...
Stand her drifting, drifting along...
When I ought to be doing the things I should do...
I think about you....
I could go crusin' but I've had enough
I could go drinkin' but I can't stand the stuff
Just don't do it like it used to do
I'd rather think about you...|~

~You come and go like the wind...
Everytime I think about you, baby I see something new...
That takes me higher than before
And makes me want you more...
I wish I don't have to go...
don't wanna leave alone...
Coz' leaving means being further from you.
oh and I'd be missing you so...~

Day's ending...
felt my age already...
with one by one my young little cousins grow up....
all big...and having the experience of their own.

one by one handling BGR issues...still hangin' in the teenage stage...
yet childish 'political' issues.

and small ones that are at least 20yrs my junior...
running about and looking up to me as like some towering monster
able to carry the whole lot of them at one sweep...

hahaaa...

Played with them like mad.
All very cute...
some still at their shy stage...some so young yet already so vocal.

Oh the adorable little things all of them.
Feels like just yesterday they were just either babies or toddlers running around giving me the blur face.

2nd day of the lunar new year...
drained....tired. HohOHo... all the helping out and stuff...
did some reading til almost 7am this morning... and redid my resume assignment...
Well hope that works well enough for me to score somewhere.

After working was good...burning all the CNY poison...cuttlefish, cookies and other junk food
that came along the way.

Guess all's good...all's just good...relax the day away and evening the entire group of relatives are flooding my house and
I'll be getting real busy. Actually thought of getting friends over but with the crowd...It's gona be hard for me to even
be a good host to them. I'm gona be kitchen man...and Mum's runner.

On another mini part of me for the day... the words "Let money work hard for you, work too hard for money and you'll die" just rings in my head for no reason at all...lol...
A sign?...well Don't know....don't really know if I should even bother about such signs...hahahaaa

And now... For the new year...
A Blue Lagoon...
No no No....not the freaking show
idiot!
not even the place!
The drink!

- 1 part of blue curacao
- 1 part of gin
- 1 part of lemon juice
- ice cubes

Put the whole lot in the shaker...
shake some booty and strain the mix
into a tall glass...
garnish with a slice of lime, lemon and a cherry..
Pop the goodie down for cool and refreshing feeling!

Ladies and Gentlemen....
Anyone care for a new shot of
Flaming Lamborghini?

- 1 part of coffee liqueur
- 1 part of cointreau
- 1 part of white sambucca
- 1 dash of cream

Add the first 3 in a shot
light the freakin' booze...
Whack in the cream on top and
down it goes!

In the midst of postal code
139212...
we find beauty and comfort
for total relaxation...
for chilling out...
free your mind away on glasses of martinis
and seated in repose
out of the rat race and quick pace of life...

Would you have ever believed me if I told you that
these are taken in our local lands, Singapore?...
Well, you can be damn sure it is in Singapore!
hahahaaa....

Today I chanced upon a Business model to make money big time!!!
Imagine with a initial capital of USD$1000, in the 7th month of investment,
you would have gained 95% of your intial capital and the rest of the remainding 8 months
period towards full muturity is plainly Dividend...aka. Profits!
OMG! and the total profit from what I calculated would be about 200%!

Damn shit...madness but...gona go more into this and whack for a test drive!
feeling like some risk these days...
erhmm...since when I wasn't....? hmmm...

~I have not shine, shivering
not opened my mind, clearly seeing
I have ignored every blessing
But now this time is for confessing...
That I feel myself surrender
Each time I see your face
I am staggered by your beauty
Your unassuming grace
And I feel my heart is turning
Falling into place
I can’t hide
Here's my confession
I have been strong without you
Away from you now, I miss you
For so long
Nothing could move me
But I realised
Now you could change me
Now I feel myself in shivers
Each time I miss your face
I am captured by your beauty
Your unassuming grace
And I feel my heart is turning
Falling into place
Girl, I can’t hide
Here's my confession~

~You've got this look i can't describe,
You make me feel like I'm alive,
When everything else is a fade,
Without a doubt you're on my side,
Heaven has been away too long,
Can't find the words to write this~

Oh yes the wonderful you...
Just as I managed to sleep...
that there you were in my dreams...
holding on to my hands asking me for a walk with you...
Delighted and I wished I didn't wake up...
but I'd say then...this sleep was a gift...
so wonderful feeling it gave ...felt so real...
that I didn't wanna wake to reality
to where I'm standing.
Anyway,
In appreciation I thank God for that still...
It was heart warming enough...
just for those moments...

Friday...
Some asked me which are the most
beautiful beaches I've been...
well I'd say Grand Cayman island or
The island of Tahiti...
Well Heard of Bora Bora?...
It's in French Polynesia though...
I couldn't really find my photos
of Cayman so... let me show you
Tahiti...Bora Bora (First born)...
The language there pronounce it as
'Pora Pora'...
You'll often find yourself directly over
waters...even during your stay in
luxury accomodations...
and sometimes you may even find the
only mode of transport to get stuff
would be a row boat...hahaa...
Of the pictures...you'll see just one
not of tahiti but of hawaii...
its just some addition to bring you
Waimea canyon. Inspite of the sign...
We climbed...hahaa....well those days...
Daredevils.. Death defying creature I was.

And then off to Japan I went! Fukuoka!
Many places I went...the wind was so strong
I could hardly open my eyes...Cold!!
Especially going to Asia's Biggest Ferris Wheel!

Funny how time flies...
just when fun was around the corner...

Went to Korea in 2003.
Climbed mountains, skii and of course
the shopping area along the streets
of Seoul. But erhmm...frankly... boring place.

Well of course not forgetting
those days in army...
hmm...here's some from
The australia trip!

Was looking around in my CDs...some collection of digital photos taken over past
few years... well there are some striking ones that really was good...
like the days when I was in windsurfing and sailing...my glorious days...
but oh well...then came to NTU...having fun and stuff...
going to Vill Bali with my Buddy felix...

Well here's some...

The reunion dinner...
finally we stop the face moving pace of our lives
sit down together and chat the evening through at dinner.
Was good...really good.
My mum's preparation was great for some hot plate BBQ and steam boat altogether.
My Dad and us all are lucky to have her.
Homemaker and a Chef...
Well...time for me to pick the whole lot up from where she is.

Then the annual big clean up will take place after dinner...
my younger brothers were activated...
how they were so small last time now,
getting older... they have to get moving too...but of course, blur at everything
well they've gotta start somewhere.
Aiding my mum with the backyard while she teaches the new maid... my sis dealing with the inside of the house...
While I saw to the pavillion, car porch and the car.
Tiring but it was good to see all working together and getting the whole clean up done fast.
When all's done...it's been always good to sit at the pavilion and enjoying the cool night breeze for awhile...
sigh...what a week has passed.

Today I came upon a thought...
for this new year...
I'll braving even more or should I say...
I'd wanna bring up this guts even stronger to brave challenges
to be where I wanna be...to have what I feel is right...
give myself a chance to the things I feel worth taking the risk for.
I'm worth it and whatever it may be..whoever it may be...
after giving it all some thought....they're all worth it...
"Cannot then cannot lor"..."Can then can lor..."

=)

It's like walking through a lonely path...
Quiet...
Empty...
and everything's dim.
The end of the road is darkened.
Light at the end of the road there isn't
'Cause you don't know where the end is...
it's like bring on a splitting road...
Going back and forth is yet darken roads
I hope standing at this point...
two lamp posts,
like gardian angels...
will keep me lighted 'til the time to move...
'til I see some light at either paths...

I've been starin' at the page for what seems like days
I guess I'm tryin' to put this one off for awhile
Did I just feel a tear fall off from my eyes?
Or have I been happy, laughed so hard that I cried?
I'm flow my secrets to you like a flowin' river
I guess the day's just bringing me down...
Only love, there's no hate
Leavin' it here for you to take...
Please know that every word is a piece of my heart...
The smiles on my face,
They came easy 'cause of you
Sometimes I think,
I love you, but I hate you
'Cause I know I can never escape you...
Through my days and through my dreams...
Some how you image and smiles are just always there.
Only love, there's no hate
Leavin' it here for you to take...
Please know that every word is a piece of my heart...
Have I said too much?
Maybe I haven't said enough...
But I know that every word is a piece of my heart...