I closed my eyes...
like having a bad dream...
I spoke...
on the verge of crying I heard the most soothing voice,
"baby...what is it?... why?"
the very voice that soothes my heart and soul...
brought back calm.
Like things just got worst
like there was no end to the horrible friday that's been...
like all of a sudden in my state of concusion I warped through a few years without you
and still I found myself lying devastated and torn apart...
feeling the emptiness.
to some they wish for time
to some they wish for riches
but to me I need both to bring me across where I am to some part
they all call wonderful.
yet I don't mind being left with nothing
holding on to on my stomach in hunger...
wrapping up in newspaper out in the rainy cold
so long the life then was led with you...
But, I guess that's where I stand...
where my stand is towards you...
what I can't give in the instance
I'd still give in time
empowered by the will of going through means...
sometimes, it's hard
sometimes it's easy...
but whatever it is....
it's the resultant that matters...
Oh anyhow, my dream my dream...
it all started from one single day
when you decided to go away...
I cried but I respected...
believing you know best what you really want...
what you'd be happy living with...
decision laid on you.
Then I found myself setting foot
at the edge...
calling for the reason to live...
the reason to carry on what seemed meaningless...
my life...
I took off and swirled back to a dimension called reality...
a dream...
bringing me back to calm was the soothing voice...
my darling beside me...
Min.

Oh this is dark friday I'm seeing...
the mere strike of it and everything seem to be going quite wrong...
it has to be exams too...
my first paper.
sux totally....

What started the day before felt warm and nice...
in giving it brought much calm within my heart...
in loving it bring me life.
fighting timing towards the 5th day of the week
and ended up being hit at all angles...
for a quiet moment in the darkness I sit and stare at the nothingness...
wondering what the hell is going on to me...
the inital bang of emotional tension hit me hard... but having to handle time constrains i had
to hold on myself and get a grip...
every moment I flip across nicely written loves
it sent me an electric shock.
had I not mention my plans that I hadn't worked out to go overseas...
would things be better?
Had I not mentioned any earlier intentions,
would there be no disappointments?
Had I not gotten the gifts...
would there be discontent?
the fact is...nobody knows....it probably would have been better
yet it probably would've been happening anyway...
But whatever the case is...
it pains my heart very much to see us in such a way.
like all of a sudden the coldness...
killing me slice by slice...
and wow...what next?
a horrible exam paper falling bias to just one side of the student cohort...
totally unfair....
why not make it all open ended? sigh...oh shit exam just gotten through?
I really don't know...
but it topped the chart of craps for the ending of the week...
I can't think....don't wanna think...
pain and disappointment in a summation....