Oh this is dark friday I'm seeing...
the mere strike of it and everything seem to be going quite wrong...
it has to be exams too...
my first paper.
sux totally....

What started the day before felt warm and nice...
in giving it brought much calm within my heart...
in loving it bring me life.
fighting timing towards the 5th day of the week
and ended up being hit at all angles...
for a quiet moment in the darkness I sit and stare at the nothingness...
wondering what the hell is going on to me...
the inital bang of emotional tension hit me hard... but having to handle time constrains i had
to hold on myself and get a grip...
every moment I flip across nicely written loves
it sent me an electric shock.
had I not mention my plans that I hadn't worked out to go overseas...
would things be better?
Had I not mentioned any earlier intentions,
would there be no disappointments?
Had I not gotten the gifts...
would there be discontent?
the fact is...nobody knows....it probably would have been better
yet it probably would've been happening anyway...
But whatever the case is...
it pains my heart very much to see us in such a way.
like all of a sudden the coldness...
killing me slice by slice...
and wow...what next?
a horrible exam paper falling bias to just one side of the student cohort...
totally unfair....
why not make it all open ended? sigh...oh shit exam just gotten through?
I really don't know...
but it topped the chart of craps for the ending of the week...
I can't think....don't wanna think...
pain and disappointment in a summation....