A winner is a title for the self fulfilled...
victory felt is what defines you...
Anything else external,
is pure ego

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I feel your imprint on my thumbs...
Your defenses highlight my weaknesses now ...
And everywhere I go I hear you in the words that I use...
And the light in my red mood...

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"Her ghost hides
In my mind
In the night
In a way she’s haunting me
I’m wanting her still
Through rose colored skies
Or blue, blue moonlight
There’s miracles on high
She’s walking by
When I look at you I’ve got a 2nd chance
Really need to have you now
One by one they fall it always breaks me down

The quiet
Cuts me thru
The candle burnt
The knife has turned
The pain withers
Alive I know deep inside
When I look at you I’ve got a second chance
Really need to take it now
One by one they fall it always breaks me down

Her ghost hides
In my eyes
In the night
In a way she’s haunting me
I’m wanting her still
Through rose colored skies
Or blue, blue moonlight
There’s miracles on high
She’s walking by"

Maybe it's...

today I just got hit by the worst wave of migraine I've every gotten!!!
ARGH!!!! totally feels like I should just pry open the skull of mine!

Maybe it's the amount of knocks I got on the thursday...
Maybe it's the total amount of combat collisions...
Maybe it's the work stress that is building up...
Maybe it's the end of it all...

Oh well... Maybe it's just pure horrible migraine...

The weird outcome of my check up...
after multiple knee jabs, my ribs which I felt the crack from...
showed no signs of internal injuries...
no signs of hair line facture...

while I gave a dislocation of jaw...hanging with a jaw lock...
and a fractured collar bone...

Something is wrong somewhere...

Maybe it's the madness all contained in the ring...
Maybe the whole survival mentality locked on once a jab at my face just forcefully punched in...
Maybe it's the rush of adrenaline altogether and heightened the extra strength...
Maybe it's just some fire deep inside that isn't extinguished...
Maybe it's just pure defence for myself when confronted by highly offensive opponent...

Oh well... Maybe it's just good training and endurance put to good use...

Whatever it is... pressure heating and rising...
I can feel it... temper not to be trifled with...

Eyes are in flames...
yet the tiresome body wishes for rest
But the mind is a running squirrel cage...
with a stupid energizer rodent...