Funny how I'd so simply just keep writing the whole day...
Be it on work, be it on thoughts and be it on feelings...
My hands are starting to just speak! what use becomes my mouth then? :p

yah crap...

Suddenly I'm feeling some burning sensation at the back of my mind...
just to fill up my adrenalin boiling blood.
Scare the wits off myself once again...
Maybe I'm just lacking of that in a while..or maybe I should say a long while.
Sometimes, being overly excited at one side of my life that is happening
might not just be a thing to do...
Then the talks of Yin and Yang will come rushing in and slap me in the face,
telling me it's all off balance.
No Kenneth...tell me, what's important in your life right now?
I constantly have my brains mumbling within itself...like it's a separate part of me.

Well, I guess I've got a few important things to me... and somehow, there is no
differentiation that I can come up with.
That's where monkhood can never come into reality in my life...
well maybe when I actually have given up on everything else...that
could just be yet the last option...
hmmm....nah....bullshit. It won't happen. Rather look at being some
long lost kungfu master hidden up in the mountains of the forgotten and
just simply live my life there myself...
where I breath the highest air, feel the coldest winds, see the darkest nights
yet the wondrous of stars and eat the grass that grow beneath my steps...
Well and just trying to forget what the hell went on 'til I came to such a point.
Oh well...just a thought though. That's when the world comes crashing on me
and I've got nobody behind me to keep my strength going...
That will be the day... or I could be simply lying in the hospital beds just staring into
the nothingness of the wall opposite me, or just the blankness of the other guy
lying, feeling just a crappy being in the hospital we both got ourselves into.

Oh anyway...
Like I said, when that time comes...the plans could've changed. Maybe the trends of being
the kungfu master or the lying in the hospital bed thing has already gone off beat in that social ring.

Now let me continue....

>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>>>

I dreamt vividly
oh yes most sincerely
words written with fire
across the grounds
that shows my desire...
Like a pitch black sky
with stars joint with symbolism
Of what can't be just blabbered...
Deep inside I held it
Held it oh so tight...
When the moment comes
I'd just show it
But....
Alas the moments keep changing
like a toy of my mind.
What's there to look for and decide on these days?
The wanting of doing so just let it fade...
not knowing when it should come yet again.
Sometimes it doesn't happen oh the pain...
and again and again you'd just hope things would be
and yet nothing you could see...
how then
I can't defend
the feelings deep inside
the very things I yet can't hide...
And then tonight I yet moved heavily...
Too like seeing a hefty 7 or more ahead...
But somehow,
no matter the strength
no matter the vision
no matter the wants...
I'm left breathless...
all in hope that a light-year crosses the path
and in a blink I feel nothing that has been hanging before
and be jolly for the next in step...
coz it's....
one
two
three
four
five...
all it's been so unkind
or maybe so...
it's a self pounding factor
that brought about that smashed
hmm oh yes the water ripples...
a reverse of power that hits with a thousand times harder...
But for now...
I just want a reason to believe....
And I'll find a way to see that it's all true...
As for now....it's just burning
so let it burn
so let it burn
burn into a speck of nothingness once again...
and tomorrow walks another day...
while now I sit with tear drop in my eye...
sometimes confused
sometimes in wonder
sometimes in ponder
but very in love....
My cocktail of flaming tequila!
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

And you find that sometimes...life simply moves in a blink...
Even the fast shutter speed catches nothing at the road burning 235km/h along the express way...
Now do you really think the speed tracking cameras are really that effective? :p

Think again...hohoho...

With high reflective night numberings and gloss enhanced finishing car surface and dark tint screens....
The only way is to track such a car in the day...otherwise, don't dream of it...when you see it...
I'll smoke you.

hahahaa...

In the moments I stare...
so blankly
wondering of what's to come tomorrow...
with some matters unclear
still smoldering in the smear...
all mixed up.

Where tomorrow lies bleak
And how the emotion shiver in uncertainty
feels hurting beyond the freezing cold...

The play of words
juggling in suspense
The moves of scorpion dance
where visions of the superficial
all with nothing of bricks and stones...

And I am left once again
at stare in total blankness of the moment...

Just came back to Singapore from Sabah...
I guess I should say that it's been really mentally exhausting this reason...
So many things to solve and so much human problems to handle.

Sometimes I wonder why some management behave in a certain way...
Either penny wise pound foolish or "Wanting the buffalo to work with no adequate grass for filling"
Have been stressing to the old minds sometimes...Look at the bloody BIG picture!

There were many things I foresaw many months ago.
Like the directive we should be going into...
The new diversification we should spread our wings to...
The incentives we should offer...
many many more...
But there don't see it until times like now...
sigh...looks like the stupid army practice is still living...
"rushing to wait and wait to rush" mentality....

Anyway that's why this time round...
I shoot off my own decisions and have started off new forms wherever I go...
So now, I just have to stand on the frontline to act Rambo to backfire pressing issues.

My couter parts all think I'm damn bold...
but what to do...it's the venture capitalist spirit...
wanna do it...then do it big and keep looking forward...

Oh well...for now... I've got some other bigger aims to attain...
and this time, I will not wait for anyone to make the decision...
when the time comes...it's probably a good thing to open my own Private Limited if
the vision in this current company doesn't go in tie with mine... :p
As they say..."Shi jian bu liu ren"
So...when the iron is hot...strike it fast!

Ok very much earlier could just a whole load of crap....
Anyone who feels the same way?
How could anything just tell my character with my name in place?

So What in the world do I really mean?

What Kenneth Chan Wai Mun Means

You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life. You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don't spill secrets or spread gossip. People sometimes think you're snobby or aloof, but you're just too deep in thought to pay attention to them. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals. You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless - and you have a lot of questions about life. You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You're most comfortable when you're far away from home. You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble. You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out. Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia. Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person. You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable. You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality. You are very charming... dangerously so. You have the potential to break a lot of hearts. You know how what you want, how to get it, and that you will get it. You have the power to rule the world. Let's hope you're a benevolent dictator! You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated. You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want. You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way! You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way. And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life. You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

And my heart pumped hard as I held your hands in mine
a warmth like a spreading qi blew through the veins and every other part of me.
It was like ecstasy a living dream afloat the free sunny skies...
And as you cling on to my arm with short glances while we watched
everything in this world simply felt so right...
enough said...

Nobody argues that the United States is far too dependent on foreign oil.
Environmental special interest groups continue to stand in the way of further exploration for and extraction of our own domestic energy resources. They respond to the growing crisis by demanding instead that we all drive less and turn to exotic, unproven sources of energy.

No one disagrees that diversifying our energy sources is a good idea. But if we really want to break free of our growing dependence on oil controlled by unstable and hostile governments, we must use domestic resource wealth to produce transportation fuels and do so in an environmentally sensitive way.

And I think something from the past is boiling right now to popularity for a big future take over!

:p

Yet another week ending..
like some messy warfront on the job
but a sunny warmth on the other side.
Mind's real stretched
with great extensions
and day's ending relaxations...
Like torrential rain
a darkening back and warmth to front.
So many hiccups
sometimes it simply gets me fed up
gotten enough of the dumping of trash...
But after words in just few moments
some light forces through the cold
To show some truth at the final moment...
Makes my life so darn interesting doesn't it?
Maybe alittle too interesting... :p

I walk I walk...
I thought and I thought
Where I'd go and where I'd not
turning left turning right
both ways somehow doesn't seem too right..
heavy hearted looking for something light...
In days like this I just...
walk...
I walk I walk...
then sitting by the swing
swaying left swaying right...
saw no reason saw no light...
Oh help me somebody
take me in custody..
A moment like this...
I just would crumble...

哪里能找到永远温暖的拥抱
谁在牵挂着孤单远行疲倦的红娘

哪里能找到受伤时候的依靠
有谁能让我烦恼的事都不再烦恼

爱不需要理由
懂得珍惜就能够拥有
为我敞开的双手

爱不需要理由
懂得珍惜就能够拥有
只有家为我等候

有一种味道能让我想起年少
有一座城堡包容原谅所有的争吵

爱不需要理由
懂得珍惜就能够拥有
为我敞开的双手

爱不需要理由
懂得珍惜就能够拥有
只有家为我等候

这爱无法取代不求回报的关怀
原来爱一直都在

Johannesburg- South Africa..

In the midst of a supposing already modernized Africa...
Still dirty, darkish and gloomy....
The air is very much filled with dust...lands of litter....





And Sometimes the streets can be oh so so confusing...one of which was Bree...
Abit dodgy district in Jozi that is currently undergoing some renewal....anyway...what a mess.



And What's new?...just like some third world countries...stall owners all say that their stuff is the best...
yakking away the whole day...aiyoh...was really disturbing esp when you're trying to think and focus on where you're going
or should I say trying to go...along a not so safe side street...
She sells some Giant Vetkoek...like some mince meat filled wrap (looks like a Pau) with cheddar cheese toppings and
chilli. But this was some where within Mandela's Market in J'burg. Yes yes....something that is alittle familiar from Singapore
if you take a closer look...you see...'Piesangs'...like our Goreng Pisang



Down in Soweto to see if I can make some improvement proposal....but nah....I think the place...is a vast piece of wasteland...
so much dirt...so much crap there....to clear it up...the people gotta start doing something themselves first....
This is like Miles of poverty over here...and yet sometimes they don't really work to help themselves....
So how to help?....
Still thinking about it. maybe when I come up with something I'll be a billionaire....

As seconds passed...
It feels like I'm gripped by a magnetic force...
so strong yet destination seem unreachable.

just recently, I've begun to think very frequently
about how I'd have to manage my future...
how I'd settle down with a place I'd call my own...
and with the things I'd say are my own
and built by me...
Suddenly it feels like I need some direction...
something to slap me straight on the path again
and I'd walk through the trying roads again...
to keep on going...

Oh well....these days I've been really thinking alot...
thinking alot about many many things...

The rush of memories of us
The 3 musketeers
20 years hath passed and yet going strong
How we've changed
from the small to the big
from the short to the tall
from the gorging monster to the conscious fanatic
like a full wave rectifier
keeping each other's strength on the go
we go down low
but ne'er the negatives
Together the 3 of us hath escalated from the talks
of kiddy wants and plays
to the move to marriage and settlement
to the reach of financial just.
However life's been trying
a rocky road
but however bumby it's been and it will be
in energized strength we will
stick on side by side..
beyond the end of days...

~To the Paulie and Richie~

"The only thing for the triumph of Evil is for Good man to do nothing,
Yet the very thing for Good to outshine is for just One man to do something"
-Hmm...have I suddenly be enlightened in thought today?.... :p

I wish..

"Let me in
to see you in the morning light
to get me on and all along the tears they come
see all come
I want you to believe in life
but I get the strangest feeling that you've gone away
will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted
all the time
I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted
all the time
some times
lift me up
just lift me up don't make a sound
and let me hold you up before you hit the Ground
see all come
you say your all right
but I get the strangest feeling
that you've gone away- you've gone away
and will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted
all the time
I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted
all the time
some times
Don't give me up
don't give me up tonight
or soon nothing will be right at all
salvation
will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be
every little thing you wanted"

Oh man...compare to what I just mentioned last night about
things going on an up slope...and today I see this horoscope thingy...
cool!

Sitting....just sitting on my desk...
Today I've got a different feeling...
just a feeling..
have I made the right choices so far in my life..?
Well the issue is...
Goodness...who really knows?
It's the calculated risk that I've taken at every step of my life...
either spending time
either spending money
either spending my brain cells with
either spending sleepless nights for
either spending all my strength and effort...
Oh but what the heck right?....
Of course there are somethings I just feel it's all a waste...
but somehow today...my views switched to a different perspective...
There were quite a number of things I've been working on....bearing fruits today..

C'mon....just 2 more days to the end of the month...and I'll see the short holidays for awhile....
need a mental break....just for awhile...

Hmmm....wait...for the next 12 days I've got to speak Mandrin!
Jiang Hua Yu! OMG....but I'll try my best as promised...
I guess it's gona be the first time I'd take up chinese for the sake of somebody...
worth it?...
well...always is. :)

And I shut my eyes...
in sudden remembrance,
of how situations...good or bad...just fired up the course
of poetic imagination...

I remembered when I let go, but the feelings that was in the
memory bank....
It was a form of raps....form of poetic war...

Well anyway...
it's been saddening enough to
know that I hit the spot of the one
who matters most...
Punishment....actually whatever it is...I'd accept...
I'm apologetic...
in fact...to know and to be conscious of
the effects and the act of it...
already...it's piercing.

And I should be geared for the 6th
ready to be full speed ahead....
erhmm....I hope.

I never thought my brain waves were colourful...
I never thought I was that active even when I'm supposed to be asleep...
crap....I think I'll age at an exponential rate...

Oh whata heck...
Does it even matter?...

Let's see what tomorrow brings...